Didn't You Know
by iwantsprezzatura
Summary: He smirked. "You've done far worse than just befriending a Slytherin." I scoffed. "You and I were friends before you even knew what Slytherin was." TomXOC - please read
1. Hogwarts

**Hello everybody... this is my first fanfiction EVER, so - forgive me if it's not that good. Also, I apologize for any linguistic mistakes, 'cause I'm not a native English speaker :) What else? Ah right, please review.**

**Disclaimer: Obviously, I don't own Harry Potter.**

* * *

HOGWARTS SCHOOL _of_ WITCHCRAFT _and_ WIZARDRY

Headmaster: ARMANDO DIPPET

Dear Ms Riley,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.

Term begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later than July 31.

Yours sincerely,

Albus Dumbledore

Deputy Headmaster

I had always known that sometime, I would receive this letter. I had known that I – daughter of a pureblood witch and a pureblood wizard – would be a witch, too and that I was magical enough to be at Hogwarts.

I hadn't known that my parents would grant me the choice. I cheered. No doubt that I would attend Hogwarts! I could see the disappointed look in my mother's eyes but I didn't care. Could she really expect that I would deny my magical abilities just like she and my dad did? It was ridiculous!  
I would be a _real_ witch now, no denying anymore. I would go to Hogwarts after all! My mother sighed, almost in despair, but once again, I didn't care.

* * *

"I am sorry, but I can find no other cabin, may I..." My voice trailed off shyly, unable to say anything more. I had already experienced the worst today.

The boy sitting next to the window barely shrugged and I took that as a yes. I had no other option, anyway. I sat down across from him. He had dark hairs and pale skin. As he raised his head, I could see his brown eyes. I shivered. Usually, this brown colour was somewhat warm. His eyes were cold.

"I'm Lorraine Riley. What's your name?"

"Tom Riddle."

"Riddle?" I repeated, thinking hardly. I had never heard that name mentioned.

His face lighted up, somehow excited. "You know any Riddles?"

I shook my head and he seemed disappointed.

"Pity."

"Why? You're not pureblood, are you?" I didn't even know why I asked; after all I couldn't care less about blood status. My parents were what blood-fanatics would call "blood-traitors". They had decided to live without magic amongst the muggles. Only when I had received my letter, I had been allowed to choose.

"I... I don't know. I grew up in an orphanage."

"Oh," I muttered. "I'm sorry."

"It's alright."

We stayed silent until I finally asked: "So you didn't even know you were a wizard?"

He frowned. "I knew I was special."

"You made things happen."

He simply nodded.

"You're surely glad."

"Huh?"

"To be amongst your own."

"Are you?"

"Incredibly so."

He smiled softly, the first time something like warmth, any emotion at all, entered his eyes and I returned his smile encouragingly.

"Which house do you want to be sorted in?"

"Which house?" he repeated, completely unaware of what I was talking about.

I giggled and spent the next half an hour to discuss the advantages and disadvantages of the four different houses. Personally, I just hoped not to be sorted to Slytherin. Not because I especially disliked it or its history, but because I knew I would hardly be accepted there. Tom, on the other hand, seemed rather thrilled when I told him about Slytherin, especially when I told him that the snake was its symbol.

"Why?" he asked with that special sparkle of interest in his eyes.

I shrugged. "Probably because Salazar Slytherin – the founder, you see – was as a Parselmouth."

"A Parselmouth?" he repeated and I sighed. I forgot that he lacked a real magical background.

"He could talk to snakes. Speak their language, if you want – the parseltongue."

Again, something sparkled in his eyes. Recognition? But the emotion didn't last long enough for me to decide whether I was right.

"I see," he finally said.

"Yeah, it's quite uncommon."

He nodded and looked out the window. "And your parents..."

I frowned as I didn't particularly like to talk about my parents. "What about them?"

"They're both wizards?"

"Yes. But... they decided to live without magic."

His gaze rushed to my face. "Why would they do that?"

"They despised this pureblood-fanaticism. They despised that so many people hate muggles. They've grown to despise the whole wizarding world."

"That's a shame."

"It is."

"But they went to Hogwarts?"

I sighed. Why was he so damn interested in that? Still I felt... I felt like I could trust him. Like he would understand and like I could just tell him anything. Like he was a friend. "Yes. They both were in Ravenclaw."

"So you expect going there, too?"

"I would be okay with it."

Someone opened the door and my gaze shot up. It was a boy, already dressed in his Hogwarts-uniform. He was probably in his fifth or sixth year and he obviously was a Gryffindor, as his tie glowed in bright red.

"First years?" he presumed and I nodded.

"Charlus Potter, prefect. We gonna arrive in half an hour, I suggest you dress up."

* * *

I returned after having dressed up. Tom also had, he looked somehow fashionably in his robes. I sat opposite to him again.

"Soon, we're going to see Hogwarts."

"May I ask a favour of you?"

I raised an eyebrow in surprise. "What would that be?"

"May I see your wand?"

"Why?" I asked while pulling it out. Of course I didn't mind.

He took it from me and looked at it. "Tell me about it."

"It's blackthorn, 11 inches, dragon heartstring."

"Was it your first try?"

I frowned. "No, my second. Why do you want to know?"

He shrugged. "Just interested."

"Give it back to me."

He handed it over and sent me an apologetic glance. "I meant no offense."

"Now, we do play fair, don't we? What about yours?"

His eyes widened and he sighed. "It's yew. 13½ inches, phoenix feather."

"Phoenix feather?" I repeated. That was unusual. Though I had to admit – blackthorn and dragon heartstring was not a most usual combo. Or a combo that not many people would like. "Show me," I begged.

He pulled it out and I took it. It was most beautiful and I could feel the power eroding from it. At the same time, I felt this power wasn't mine to use. This wand belonged – though only for such a short time – completely to the young boy across from me.

"Well, it's surely mighty."

"How do you know?"

I shrugged. "Wands with a phoenix feather are known to be very mighty."

The train slowed down and I glanced outside the window in frantic expectation. This would be my life now; I finally could be who I really was.

* * *

We entered the Great Hall in single file, but we soon loosened up as there was enough space. I didn't allow my eyes to settle even for a second, there was just so much to take in. Just then the sorting began. And the Professor, a man with a long brown beard and sympathetic, yet serious eyes started calling out the names. Starting with Abbott, sorted into Hufflepuff, followed by Avery, sorted into Slytherin...

"Hey, that's the man who told me I'm a wizard," Tom whispered, pointing at the Professor.

"What's his name?"

"Dumbledore."

I nodded and muttered: "He seems nice."

"Don't share the feeling."

Lestrange, sorted into Slytherin. Then, Longbottom, sorted into Gryffindor. Malfoy, sorted into Slytherin.

Finally, it was time for R. "Riddle, Tom."

He shot me a quick glance and I nodded encouragingly, suddenly filled by the irrational hope that he might be in the same house as me, probably Ravenclaw. He stepped in front and set down. Professor Dumbledore put the hat on his head and... "SLYTHERIN!"

I gasped. The hat had barely touched his head! There were quick decisions, truth be told, we had seen some today but this was rather exceptional. I gulped. Tom got up and joined the Slytherins who clapped fanatically.

"Riley, Lorraine."

I moved forward and sat down. He put the hat on me and suddenly, I heard a voice.

"_Well, well, blood traitor, huh?"_

I frowned. Great, even the hat was a pureblood-fanatic.

"_Not at all... well, intelligent so much is clear, really, rather brilliant...but cunning, as well, ready to reach your goals. Still, I think, better go to..."_

"RAVENCLAW!" the hat shouted out loud and I sighed in relief. At least, this was what I had wished for. The same house my parents attended. Though... of course it wasn't with Tom. Why the hell did that bother me? I barely knew the boy!

I sat down next to a girl who had earlier been sorted to Ravenclaw. Something with an H, I couldn't quite recall.

"So, Lorraine _Riley **,**_aren't your parents these..."

"Blood-traitors, right."

"I didn't mean to say that."

"But you thought it."

She shrugged. "I'm Olive Hornby. Meant no offense."

I smiled. "Sorry, that's just a..."

"Sore point."

"Right."

She smiled as we watched the sorting go on. Smith, sorted into Hufflepuff. Then Weasley, sorted into Gryffindor.

My gaze met Tom's, sitting in the mass of Slytherins. I shot him an apologetic look, he shrugged and smiled. He seemed quite happy with his sorting, though.


	2. Talented Students

**Back again! Thanks to all those who read, fav'd, alerted and especially to those who reviewed! **

**Unfortunately, I haven't gained the rights on Harry Potter this week, so I still don't own.**

**Slytherin has won the first ever Pottermore House Cup, yay! *victory-dance* I'm rather proud of my house ;D**

**With that said, on to THE Slytherin:**

* * *

I entered the Potions classroom followed by Olive and Lydia Lovegood. My gaze flickered over the other students. We shared this class with Slytherin. My eyes settled on Tom, who sat alone at his table, although he was chatting with some of the other Slytherin boys. Olive and Lydia gave me an apologetic look as they sat next to each other, but I didn't mind. I wasn't the only one to be alone.

"Is that seat still free?"

"What do you want, blood-traitor?"

I eyed the boy who had dared to speak to me like that. He had light blonde hair, so I supposed he was a Malfoy. "I didn't talk to you."

"How do you even dare...?"

"It's alright, Abraxas," Tom said, almost sounding indifferent. His eyes fixed on me. "It is. Have a seat."

I send Malfoy my sweetest smile and sat down. He scoffed and turned around on his heel.

"I'm sorry," I muttered. "If I have interrupted your conversation."

"It's better like this. He was just babbling about how great the Malfoy family is."

"It's not great."

"It's a very old, pureblood family," he said as if he was lecturing on me.

I turned my head to look him in the eyes. Just yesterday we had discussed that! That he was probably a half-blood – he couldn't be a muggle-born as he was sorted in Slytherin – because he grew up in a muggle orphanage! That all this pureblood-fanaticism was just pointless and stupid.

"Well, I'm pureblood, too. Probably more pure-blooded than a lot of these idiots!"

"I'll tell him not to call you like that anymore."

"And why would that stop him?"

He didn't answer me; instead he turned his head to the front, just the second that a fat man stepped in front of the class.

"Welcome, ladies and gentleman, to Potions Class. I'm Horace Slughorn. I would beg you all to open your books at page..."

* * *

I didn't only share Potions with Tom. In fact, the Ravenclaws passed also Transfiguration, History of Magic and Herbology with the Slytherins. Charms, Astronomy and Defence Against the Dark Arts were held together with the Gryffindors. As Slytherins and Gryffindors both proved a lot of hatred for each other, teachers had decided to keep them apart. This resulted in the other two houses always sharing the classes with either one of them, but never would there be a Hufflepuff-Ravenclaw-class.

Each time, I would sit with Tom.

I had entered Transfiguration earlier than him and he had asked, just like I had before: "Is that seat still free?", thus making it an insider-joke.

We had started easy-off, with that match-to-needle thing, supposedly the simplest of all transfigurations. After two hours of practicing like mad, we finally did it – and were the only ones, both appointed 10 points for our houses.

* * *

"WINGARDIUM LEVIOSA!" Lydia shouted, but her feather didn't even move. Olive failed with a similar try.

"You're doing it all wrong," I explained, careful not to let our professor hear me. She would surely consider this most arrogant and I wanted to keep a good reputation.

"You're not pronouncing it correctly. It's... Win-gaaar-dium Leviosa, not Wingardium Leviosaaaa – make the gaaar nice and long."

They stared at me in wide eyes. Tom had shown me that yesterday and I had managed after just a few tries. Obviously I was catching up to him.

"Wingardium Leviosa!" I said and waved my wand just right. The feather flew up in the air.

"OH! Everybody look, Miss Riley reached our lesson's goal. 10 points to Ravenclaw!"

I smiled at her widely. I definitely had something to tell him about.

* * *

"Transfiguration sucks."

"You just say that because you didn't get that O you wanted."

"Well, easy for you to say, you got it."

I shrugged. When he was angry, there was hardly a point arguing with him.

"We should go outside for a bit."

"I need to finish that essay."

"What's that?"

"History of magic."

"Boring," he muttered.

I grinned. I knew the general lack of interest in Professor Binn's subject here at Hogwarts, but I found it incredibly interesting. And I knew that Tom felt the same.

"Can't share that. Old Binn's is really living his subject."

"Come on, we should enjoy the weather as long as it keeps being that good."

I sighed and looked out the window. The castle's surroundings were enlightened in bright sunlight. He was right. The weather wouldn't keep steady any longer; we were fast approaching the winter.

"Alright then, let's get going." I waved my wand and my essay rolled itself up. I put it in my bag.

We left the library in silence, afraid to get caught by the librarian. As we crossed the Entrance Hall, we unfortunately got held up by Professor Slughorn.

"Mr Riddle, Miss Riley, heading outside?"

"Yes, Sir."

"Enjoying tue splendid weather, I suppose? Well I wanted to ask you..."

"Whatever you wish for, Professor," Tom said at once and I was rather surprised that Slughorn wasn't bothered by his obvious schmoozing.

Instead, he smiled widely. "I've organized a little meeting. My most talented students and maybe I can gain some old friends from the ministry to join us..."

"Both of us, Sir?" I asked and he looked at me, with a wide smile.

"Of course, Miss Riley. The two of you are my most exceptional students in this year and..."

"We would be delighted to attend, Sir."

Slughorn seemed more than satisfied as he smiled again, showing his big teeth and then went off to the dungeons.

"Do you realize what just happened? This will be really boring."

Tom shrugged and started to move and I followed him outside. He stretched out his hand and took mine.

* * *

I went home for Christmas and soon regretted the choice. Being with my self-chosen-not-magical family drove me mad. Especially because my parents had managed to teach my younger siblings the fear of magic I had never experienced. I had to dive back in into the muggle-live I didn't want anymore.

I returned after the holidays, exhausted and irritable. I couldn't cope with it a moment longer. How was I supposed to survive the summer without a single hint of magic?  
I sat down next to Tom, not even bothering that this was the Slytherin table.

"You're back!" he cheered and I smiled.

"Yeah... muggle live is hell."

"Tell me about it."

I sighed heavily. "What is it, Malfoy?"

Abraxas Malfoy was staring at me with glowing hatred, just as Nott and

Lestrange did. "I don't like your filthy blood-traitor face at our table."

Before any of us could blink, Tom had pointed his wand at him.

"Careful, Malfoy."

I squeaked. "Let it go, Tom."

Of course, he didn't listen to me. A third-year girl turned to us. "What's going on there?"

"It's nothing, Lucretia."

"Malfoy's just being his usual inane self."

"Who's that, Riddle? Are you bringing all other houses here now?"

Tom almost growled while saying: "Her blood's as pure as it can possibly be, what is the problem of you folk?"

"You're that blood-traitors' daughter, am I wrong?"

"Cut it, Black."

Oh, a Black. I eyed her. This family was one of the most obsessed with blood purity.

"No, Riley, truth be told, that is a real wizarding family... pity your parents deny magic."

"It is," I agreed, earning favourable looks from the whole group.

The girl shrugged. "I hope you don't follow their example."

"I don't mean to."

"Well, then – you gonna leave her alone, Malfoy."

Abraxas glared at her, but he didn't dare to object and Tom finally put down his wand, but still kept it lying on the table, as if he warned them.

* * *

I had never believed that exams could be easy, but as I had practiced well, I passed them without effort. Of course, it was the same for Tom. Actually, we both were already ahead of our classes. I absolutely adored it.

As I was about to enter the Hogwarts Express back to London, I nearly cried. "Don't cry, sweetheart, you're just going back home."  
I glared at Tom, who had put an arm around my shoulders. This was absolutely inappropriate and I could hear Lydia and Olive giggling.

"I'm not going home. This is my home."

He shrugged. "I'm going back to that damn orphanage! Still want to complain?"

I shook my head. Of course, going back home was much better than what expected him back there. "I'm just sad."

"We'll be back before we know it."

I sighed heavily. "We should get in."

"Yeah, we should."

I looked up at him and saw him staring at the castle just as I did, with that longing look. "Cheer up, Tom; we'll be back before we know it."

He smirked and finally let go of me. "I can't sit with you, you know? I have to make sure Malfoy and Avery behave."

"What do you mean, you have to?"

"Well, if you want to be a good leader..."

"Merlin, Tom, you sound as if they were followers, not friends."

He didn't bother to reply to that. Instead he said: "You got Hornby and Lovegood, do you?"

I shrugged. "Gonna see you in London then? To say goodbye."

"Sure." He half-smiled, the best I could get today, and disappeared into the crowd.

* * *

**Review? Please?**


	3. Good Impression

**Hello there :) Thanks to all those who read, alerted and especially to those who reviewed! **

**I checked my ID and it doesn't say Joanne K. Rowling, so yeah. I don't own.**

**I just realized that it's Friday 13. Oh my. However. Year Two:**

* * *

I was beyond nervous as I pushed my cart through the wall at King's Cross to get to Platform 9¾. My parents didn't even accompany me, no magic they said. I sighed at the thought that they didn't get my most essential idea: Magic is might.

I stood and watched. I spotted both Lydia and Olive, but I didn't feel like joining them. I was waiting for someone else. Finally, I spotted Tom in the middle of a Slytherin group. A year ago, I would've rather died but join them, but since Lucretia Black had so easily accepted me, they all seemed to cope.

"Hey there."

Tom's face lightened up and he hugged me. "I missed you!"

"Missed you, too. How are you?"

"Better, now that we're heading back."

"You look like you had a bad summer," stated Malfoy and I looked at him, incredulous. Since when did he care?

"Two months with no magic at all, I feel like a bloody muggle."

They all laughed and I knew I had hit that magical spot to win their sympathy.

"Lorrie? Lorrie, over here!"

I turned around and saw that Lydia and Olive had remarked me. "I gotta go."

My eyes met Tom's and he muttered: "Will you sit with us?"

I nodded without thinking about it twice. Maybe they sorted too soon.

* * *

While we watched the first-years being sorted, Lydia and Olive tried to tell me everything they had chatted about in the train.

"Oh, and then we talked about... Lorraine?"

My eyes widened as I woke up from my daydreams. "Sorry, what?"

"Why don't you go and be a Slytherin for good?"

"Olive!"

I managed to smile. "Merlin, I don't want to be a Slytherin! I just needed to catch up with Tom."

"And you didn't need to catch up with us?"

"I have all the time of the world to catch up with you; we are in the same house."

Lydia sighed. "You shouldn't hang out with these people all too much. My mother says they have a bad influence."

I knew exactly what her mother meant. Hanging out with them made you numb for all this pureblood-fanaticism. Though I was far from being obsessed with that as well, I felt how I gradually stopped being bothered by it.

"Rubbish. They don't influence me at all."

* * *

We were heading for Herbology; Professor Beery was to teach us about Mandrakes today and we were not too thrilled about it. Herbology was just boring – still we had to be as polite and as committed as always.

Tom had taken my hand. He had a bad day today; the night had been filled with nightmares, though he didn't want to tell me what they were about. He needed me there and that was why I didn't object, although I could already hear the rumours spreading.

"Slughorn wants to hold that meeting tomorrow night."

I frowned "Really? How do you know?" We didn't even have Potions this week up to now, the class was held this afternoon.

He shrugged. "I met him in the dungeons. Head of house and stuff..."

I sighed. I didn't like these meetings, most of them were boring, but it was an honour to be invited and I appreciated that Slughorn didn't reject me because of my parents. "So, I'm gonna keep free."

"Great. I wouldn't want to go alone."

"Alone? You can't even count the Slytherins who join in..."

"Malfoy, Lestrange, Avery..."

"Nott, some of the Blacks – in short, all your friends."

"However, it's better when you come along."

"Sure, I always do."

"Hey there." We were joined by the Slytherins just mentioned. Malfoy's face enlightened by his most charming smile, Avery and Lestrange looked at me likewise. Nott didn't even bother to fake that smile.

"What's up?"

"What should be up?" Tom asked coldly. "Are you all prepared for class?"

"Hardly. And why should we?" answered Malfoy.

"Because Slytherins should make a good impression."

They all seemed to have a bad conscience at once. I couldn't help but admire Tom for how he had them all on toast.

"We gonna be on our best behaviour, don't worry."

Tom just glared at them and they really seemed worried. "Well. Can't change that anymore, can I?"

* * *

I sat on the Ravenclaw table, chatting with Lydia and Olive while we were taking supper. Charms was up next after our break and many of the students were still working on the essays that were to hand in today. I had finished mine days ago, with Tom's help as they had already had the topic a few weeks ago.

"So, how was that _Slug Club_ meeting?"

"It's not my fault it's called like that."

"Well, who's is it?"

"Don't know, Slughorn's himself, probably."

Olive scoffed. "No wonder you don't know. You're just in there because you get to work with Riddle in Potions."

Lydia slapped her on the arm, but I just shrugged. "We'll see in the exams." I knew she was jealous – and I knew that I was good, no matter if I worked with Tom or not. Only, when I worked with Tom, we both were perfect.

"How's Riddle these days anyway? I haven't seen you cuddling for long."

"We are not cuddling!"

Lydia giggled. "He's touching you whenever possible."

I didn't bother to explain them that it didn't mean anything. Tom just needed closeness and I just gave him what he wanted. We were friends, bloody hell and nothing more. Nothing had ever happened or would ever happen that would turn out otherwise.

"Will he go home for Christmas?"

I simply shook my head. I had asked him the same question just a few days ago and he had laughed at me. If I really thought that he would voluntarily go back to that damn muggle orphanage? Asked like that, I had to acknowledge my question had been stupid.

"And what about you? I'm so looking forward to see my parents..."

"No, I'm not going home. I would just miss the magic."

"You gonna have to go home, eventually."

"Well, I'm not going if I don't have to."

They both looked at me in surprise. Obviously, they both couldn't get that I wasn't particularly missing my parents. I loved them, deeply, as I loved my siblings but... well, considering my new live, I just couldn't imagine living their live again.

Suddenly, someone put his hand on my shoulder, his thumb softly striking my neck. I turned around to him and smiled.

"Tom! Why don't you have a seat?"

He shot the first-year-girl next to me a look that clearly said: don't mess with me and she moved away immediately. Tom really had this aura.

He slipped in the seat next to me and smiled charmingly at my friends. "Hornby. Lovegood."

"Riddle," Lydia answered coldly. "What do you want?"

"Nothing in particular."

Underneath the table, I took his hand, trying to calm him, even before his anger could build.

"Well, why don't you just get lost?"

"OLIVE!"

He turned his head to me and whispered in my ear. "You know, my housemates are much more tolerant."

I snorted. "That's just because they're whipped by you."

He shrugged, his thumb softly rubbing my hand. "Does the why really matter?"

I glared at him. Never would I admit that in fact, the Slytherins tolerated me much more than the Ravenclaws tolerated Tom. It might be because Tom had told them to, but maybe they just grew to accept me. My parents might be blood-traitors, but still we were an old, pureblood family and I obviously wasn't "one of those unworthy muggle-friends".

"It does. Let's get going, I need to pick my things from the common room."

"I'll accompany you."

We got up, leaving Lydia and Olive alone, who probably started spreading their pointless rumours again.

* * *

"Do you already know which courses you'll add?"

I nodded.

"You gonna tell me?"

I smirked at him. "Maybe. If you tell me your choice first."

"Care for Magical Creatures and Arithmancy. Now, tell me."

I raised an eyebrow. "Since when are you interested in magical creatures?"

"Tell me."

I sighed. He could be so insistent. "I'm taking Study of Ancient Runes and Muggle Studies."

"Muggle Studies?" he repeated. "You're not serious."

"I am very serious. I've lived like a muggle for years, I'm predestined to get an O and that's what I want."

He let himself drop in the chair across from me and I returned my look to the book I was just reading. Potions homework sucked.

"You are a pureblood. It's simply wrong to..."

"Cut the crap, Tom. You'll have to work hard to get your grades in Arithmancy, and I won't have to do anything to get them. Tell me that's wrong."

I could feel him still staring at me. "What?"

"I don't get you at all. When my friends are around..."

"Your friends, Tom? I don't know who you're talking about."

My eyes met his and I remarked he was glaring at me.

"Are you such a hypocrite? Do you believe in pureblood superiority, or not?"

"No, I don't."

He got up and shook his head. "You really are hypocritical."

"I'm trying not to get you into trouble with your... friends, as you call them. And right, I'm ready to say practically everything. You of all people shouldn't tell me about being hypocritical. Being a half-blood and all."

"Screw you."

"Yeah, whatever."

He turned around and left. I stared at the closed door behind him for a while and then went back to my reading.

* * *

"I'm sorry."

"Of course."

He put his hands on both sides of my head and leaned in a bit. "I shouldn't have said it."

"Right. But I shouldn't have stressed the topic again."

He frowned. "So, you're not mad?"

"We had a little spat, I'm over it already."

He seemed really relieved as I said that. "So, we're still friends..."

"Best friends, you know that."

He nodded and backed off.

"You can touch me, you know, I won't bite."

"People are talking."

"Since when do you care?"

"I... I just don't want to give anyone a wrong impression."

"If you mean me with anyone, then don't worry: I don't have any wrong impressions."

He turned away and I followed him.

"You shouldn't tell my friends that you chose Muggle Studies."

"I can defend myself. You know, it's hilarious to see how these stupid, worthless muggles cope without magic."

He glared at me. "Fun for an hour, not for several years."

"Please let me decide for myself, alright?"

He sighed. "Why can't you be sensible?"

"I'm perfectly sensible, don't bother yourself."

"Lorraine? We found a compartment..."

"Oh," I muttered as I looked at Lydia. "Well, I already said I would sit with Tom."

Lydia stared at me and then she whispered: "With the Slytherfreaks? Seriously?"

"This is not about the Slytherins, this is about Tom."

"He is one of them, after all."

I glared at her. "You sound like Olive."

He shook her head in disbelief and turned around. I stared after her as Tom put his hand on my shoulder. "Don't worry, love, she'll come around."

I turned around and shrugged his hand off as I moved towards the train. "Honestly. I don't really care."

* * *

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	4. Blood Traitor

**I'm sorry for being a little late with my update - I visited Berlin with a friend, and it was totally awesome - however, I'm updating now.**

**Thanks to those who read, fav'd, alerted and especially to those who reviewed!**

* * *

"So, tell me, darling - why did you pick Muggle Studies?"

I raised my head and looked at my grandmother. My mother sighed heavily. At least once during the holidays, my grandparents decided that they wanted to see me. And though they despised my parents – their own daughter after all – they couldn't do it without inviting them, too.

"Well, I... I guess I know muggle life, so I'm quite sure I'll get good grades."

"I don't see why any wizard or witch should know about muggles. They're just worthless..."

"Mother!"

My eyes locked with those of my grandmother. "Ah, you have to know your enemy."

Nana grinned. "See, Lucida, the girl has the right spirit."

My mother eyed me disappointedly. She just didn't get it. Whenever you live in a society, you have to adjust. I was adjusting perfectly.

"I'm quite disappointed, though, that she didn't go to Slytherin."

"Well," my father mumbled. "She practically did."

My grandmother frowned and I shrugged. "I have some friends there. I wouldn't say I'm practically a Slytherin."

"Proud to be a Ravenclaw?"

My eyes wandered to my grandfather who had for the first time taken the word. "I wouldn't say that either. I don't think that in Ravenclaw anyone is truly ever proud. At least not of anything besides the own intellect."

"That's because there are so many mudbloods in this house. What should they be proud of?"

"Gramps, please. Don't call them like that."

He raised an eyebrow, but didn't object. My mother looked at me in confusion.

"So, and you're surely good at school?"

I nodded, but didn't bother to answer. Instead my father muttered: "She's top of her year. With that boy, what's his name, honey? He helps her a lot, obviously."

"His name's Tom. And actually, we help each other. Sometimes, I'm better than him. Like in Transfiguration."

"A boy?" my grandmother asked. "Do I have to tell you, that...?"

"I'm thirteen, nana. Please."

I turned my attention to the window and the peaceful nature outside. Why couldn't it be like that in here? I longed for peace... for warmth. Most of all, I longed for a friend right now.

* * *

"What do you think when you're saying things like that?"

"Like what, mother?" I sat across from here in the compartment and looked at her with lazy curiosity.

"Like saying muggles are our enemies."

"I'm adjusting, mother. Most wizards and witches believe that we should keep from them as they persecuted us for centuries."

"Because they are afraid! Besides, that doesn't make the muggle-borns any less magical."

I just shrugged. I didn't feel like arguing right now. Of course, I didn't have anything against muggle-borns. I was adapting this Slytherin way of talking, though.

"I don't like that you hang out so much with Slytherins. They have a bad influence on you."

"Tom's my best friend, mother. I will not keep away from him."

"You will, young lady, or..."

"Or what?" I asked my father and he stared at me in surprise. "You gonna do what? If you would like to recall, I'll be at Hogwarts, far away from you and I will do as I please. And besides: what could you do? You abandoned magic. I didn't. I never will. Don't think you can order me around."

* * *

"Don't be like that, tell us how your summer was."

"I told you I don't want to talk about it."

Lydia looked at me with concern. I had decided to sit with them on the train because I wanted to keep the friendship up. At least two Ravenclaws I got along with.

"Just go ahead. We are friends."

"I told you I don't want to!"

Olive sighed. "You're in a mood."

"I spent the last months with my freaking blood-traitor family; of course I'm in a mood!"

They stared at me. "You don't mean what you're saying."

I groaned and got up. "Mind you, you have to know."

Lydia sighed heavily as I left. I marched through the wagon, careful not to bump into some children, obviously first years, which were running around.

I leant next to a window as I had passed them.

"Now look at that, not with your friends?"

I looked up and saw Abraxas Malfoy standing in front of me. "We had a little quarrel."

"I thought that. We're just sitting over there. Want to join in?"

I eyed him suspiciously. "Tom's with you, I suppose?"

"Of course."

"He sent you?"

Abraxas blinked, obviously startled that I had figured that out. "I... well."

"Don't bother. I don't expect you to be nice."

He frowned and I followed him to the compartment. Tom smiled at me with genuine delight and I let myself fall into the seat next to him.

"I missed you."

"Yeah? I take it you had a bad summer then."

"Well. My grandparents absolutely loved me for when I said something against muggles. But then they really freaked out about the fact that we are friends. You know boy-girl-stuff. And my parents absolutely freaked out _because_ I said something against muggles. So, I had a _really_ bad summer."

Alphard Black, who sat opposite to me, simply shrugged. "That's just life with some blood-traitors. Nothing unusual."

Everyone else looked at me with a slight hint of concern. Usually, I would always protest. This time, I really didn't feel like it. "Tell me about it."

After a few moments of awkward silence, the other Slytherins started to laugh and I rested my head on Tom's shoulder. "I'm so happy to go back."

"A little tired?"

"Just a little."

* * *

"Tell me, Miss Riley, any news about your dear grandfather?"

"He told me to tell you his greetings. He's very fond of the fact that you're... still a teacher here."

I had wanted to say _that you're my teacher._ But I didn't want to sound like I was relying on his good connections. I wasn't. I didn't want a great career in the ministry. At least – I couldn't imagine it now. I was only thirteen!

"I can believe that. And your parents, how are they?"

"Fine, Sir."

"Still, not magical?"

"Pity, but yes, I'm afraid so, Sir."

He sighed heavily. "It really is a pity. Both your father and your mother were very promising students. Good family, you see, and smart."

"I'll tell them. They'll rejoice." I was sure as hell that they wouldn't – quite the opposite, probably – but I wanted to end the subject. All this talking of my family made me uncomfortable and only reminded the others that I technically was a blood-traitor.

"And Lestrange, what about..."

Slughorn finally turned his attention to someone else and I noticed Tom's sympathetic smile. He himself hadn't been questioned, seen as he had no news of interest for Slughorn. Lucky him.

When Lestrange had at long last finished talking about his parents, his uncles and all the other relatives that had sent their greetings to Slughorn, the Professor finally let us go.

I jumped up and left, Tom following straight behind me. "What's that with you? You're not usually that bored by the meetings."

I turned around and shrugged. "I just... I can't keep on hearing about all those others and how they live their normal pureblood life and... and me? Why the hell did I have to be born to the greatest blood-traitors of all?"

"Better than not knowing your family at all."

I regretted my words at once. "You'll find them, sooner or later."

"What makes you so sure?"

"That you want it. Tom Riddle always gets what he wants."

He smirked at me and nodded.

* * *

I sat in the common room and lazily waved my wand to let my quill scribble on its own while I silently dictated. DADA-essays sucked, of what use were they? I much more appreciated practicability.

"When will you have finished?" Lydia sat next to me.

"Why do you want to know?"

"Olive and I wondered..."

"If I could help? Sorry. I have a lot to do and I won't write your essays. Teachers will notice."

"I wasn't to ask for that."

I stayed silent and waited, my quill bumping up and down for it had nothing to do.

"No, we wondered whether you would go to Hogsmeade with us?"

"I won't go to Hogsmeade."

"Why?"

I sighed and muttered: "_Finite._" The quill dropped on the essay. Obviously this conversation was going to take longer.

"As I already said, I have a lot to do. I can't fool around in that one pony town."

"You have to relax a bit! Let go, enjoy yourself! You gonna go mad if you keep on..."

"I have to keep up. You know, it doesn't come from nothing to be that good."

"You want to keep up with Riddle?"

I sighed. I wasn't up for a _Tom-is-not-good-for-you_-type of argument right now. "Well, he obviously sets the mark."

"You want to impress him."

"I don't need to impress him, Lydia. I just need to get good grades."

I waved my wand once again and the quill rose. "A werewolf will never actually..." I dictated.

"You're so stubborn," she shrieked, interrupting me while the quill noted down her words.

"No," I muttered. _Delete that," _I ordered and the whole phrase disappeared.

* * *

"Please, Miss Riley. It's teapot to tortoise."

My eyes wandered from Professor Dumbledore to the teapot in front of me and I pointed my wand it. I whispered the incantation and the teapot transformed. My tortoise was perfect. I hadn't had a doubt about it, I had practiced like mad. My goal for Transfiguration was an O. And better than Tom, though that was only an extra-point.

"Perfect. Outstanding."

I cheered. "Thank you, Professor."

"Not thanks to me, my dear, only thanks to you."

I left the room and found Tom waiting for me. "So?"

"What do you think?"

"I think it would be a shame if you would get any less than an O."

"Well, good thing I didn't get any less."

He grinned at me. "Knew it."

"Yourself?"

"Only got the E."

I pitied him a little bit, but he soon cheered up. He was top in everything else, why bother with Transfiguration?

"Lorraine! Lorrie! Come on, we're celebrating the end of exams."

I quickly exchanged a look with Tom and he smiled encouragingly. Apparently, he didn't mind my going. He had his own friends after all. I joined Olive and Lydia and some other Ravenclaws and we went outside to the lake.

"Are you happy with your grades?" Olive asked me and I nodded.

"Very much so."

"Well, I failed Divination. But after all, who does not?"

I laughed shortly and lay down on the grass as so many others did. I realized once again how much I despised going home. It didn't feel like it – my parents, my siblings, the tiny house – it didn't feel like home. Hogwarts was my home. Why did I have to leave?

I sat up again and found the others chatting about their plans for the holidays. Quite the opposite of me. Sometimes I wondered how I could so not fit with them, seen as the Sorting Hat had placed me in the same house. I would probably never figure it out.

* * *

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	5. I'm Never Going To Die

**Back pretty quickly this time... Thanks to those who read, alerted and to SuperMegaFoxyAwesomeHotness (awesome penname, by the way) who reviewed.**

**Did you see the opening ceremony of the Olympics yesterday? It was amazing - J.K. Rowling was reading in it and they had a giant puppet of Voldemort! Doesn't that fit?  
On to the chapter.**

* * *

"Uh-oh. I'm sorry."

I shyly smiled up at the fifth-year that I had just bumped in.

"Don't bother. You're... Lorraine Riley, right?"

I looked at him in amazement. Even though he was a Ravenclaw, I didn't even know his name and he simply knew mine. Of a girl not even his age.

"Err... yes. And you are?"

"Fabian Hitchin."

"Nice to meet you, Fabian."

* * *

"So, uh... what's going on with you and that Hitchin-guy?"

"Don't know what you're talking about."

"Come on, Lorraine; don't take me for a fool."

I shrugged and kept on making notes of what Professor Slughorn told us about the potion we were about to brew.

"Lorraine!"

"It's none of your business."

Suddenly, his slender fingers fixed around my wrist and kept me from writing. My eyes shot up to him. "What the hell, Tom?"

"Tell me, or I'll go straight to Olive and ask _her_."

I groaned and he let go of me as he felt me giving in. He could be so damn insistent! "Fine, it's... really, it's nothing. We just... we met once or twice out on the grounds. And last time, we went to Hogsmeade together."

I tried to hide my emotions from him as the memories kept forcing their way back in. My hand in Fabians, his soft lips on my cheek... his lips capturing mine...

"You're together or something?"

I felt a bit of annoyance of him questioning me like this. And even though I really had no clue, I answered: "Yeah, I guess so."

"What do your parents say?"

"They don't need to know."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

My eyes met his for one last glance, but I couldn't keep them there. _Because I didn't know how. _"I just didn't want to go public."

"I thought I was your best friend?"

_You are and I bloody didn't know how you would take it._ "You are."

He stayed silent for a while and then he muttered: "I don't like him."

"Merlin, Tom. Do you really think that would bother me?"

He stared at me and then turned around to face his cauldron. I felt bad at once. "Come on, I'm sorry... I don't... I mean. You don't even know him. He's a nice guy."

"Yeah. Sure you would say so."

"Please, Tom, don't be like this. I really don't know where your problem is."

He scoffed and ignored me for the rest of class.

* * *

We were sitting in the Ravenclaw common room. Fabian had his arm around my shoulders and I leant casually into him. Lydia, Olive and some of his friends sat with us in front of the fire. We were quite having a good time.

"Hey, Lorrie, what I wanted to ask you: did you actually get into a fight with Riddle? Didn't see you together the latest time."

I felt Fabian stiffen and he pulled away. I sighed heavily. Well done, Olive. "Why, yes, we sort of did. He's being immature."

"Riddle?" Fabian asked. "We're talking about Tom Riddle? That Slytherin boy?"

"Sure," Olive said. "Didn't you know they were friends?"

"Well, no."

I sighed. "We know each other since first year on the train, so..."

"You never actually told me that you were friends. I wonder why that is."

I groaned. "That's because it's no big deal."

"No big...," Olive started, but Lydia and I both interrupted her: "OLIVE!"

Fabian stood up and I caught his arm. "Come on, don't be like that. It's really..."

"Now, listen to me: you will stop seeing that Riddle guy."

"What? No!"

He glared at me and pulled free. The door to Ravenclaw tower fell shut behind him.

* * *

"I really _do _think it's kinda sweet. He's jealous."

"It's disgusting and stupid. If he's being like that I don't need him."

"Oh, come on, Lorrie..."

"No, not come on, Lorrie – he's got so no reason to be jealous and I won't have it."

"Problems?"

I froze in place and turned around to see Tom leaning against a wall I had just passed. I could swear he hadn't been standing there just a moment ago.

Lydia sighed heavily. "We'll leave you to it."

"What..." Olive protested, but Lydia grabbed her arm and pulled her away.

"What do you want?"

"I heard you and Hitchin are having trouble in paradise."

"Sometimes I really want to know where you got your information from."

He smirked and took two steps in my direction. "So, I'm right?"

"Yeah, we actually did fight. Over you, by the way. He got jealous."

He still had that smirk on his face and I didn't like it. "Why is it that you're in such a good mood?"

"Why, I'm not in a good mood. I'm just... I missed you the last few weeks."

I rolled my eyes. "You could've just apologized."

I started walking down the corridor and he followed me. "What for?"

"Oh, I beg you."

He stayed silent until we reached the Great Hall. "So... did you break up?"

"For now. I don't... I don't really know."

He shrugged. "You know, I never liked him."

I froze and looked at him. Something about the way he said that was odd. As if... as if he had just _wanted _that to happen. And Tom Riddle always got what he wanted.

"Yeah," I muttered. "Whatever."

* * *

"Merry Christmas." I sat down across from him at the Slytherin table, ignoring the incredulous looks of both older and younger students.

I handed him a small box and he took it with a questioning look. "Go on, open it. I want to see if you like it."

He sighed and opened it. "A diary? Seriously."

I smiled. "I just wanted a little something. You know, you can keep your heart and your soul in it."

He frowned "I'll try it out. I feel bad, you know I have nothing for you."

"Don't. Besides you're just saying that to be nice."

"Why are you not on Ravenclaw table, huh?"

"What for? Who's waiting there for me?"

"Ay, no one, I just thought..."

"You just thought I shouldn't sit here, right? Because they're looking."

He sighed heavily. "You make it hard on them."

"Your friends cope. The others can, too."

He didn't answer me and his eyes travelled restlessly throughout the Great Hall. As usual, during the Christmas break, Hogwarts was – relaxingly – empty.

My own eyes fixed on a girl sitting further down the table with her friends. I smirked. "You know. Phoebe Greengrass is watching you all the time."

"You wanna say what?"

"She surely wouldn't mind your attention."

Now it was him who smirked. "Oh, she _had_ my attention."

I stared at him blankly, trying to process what he had just said. "Sorry, what?"

He smirked. "She was not good, though. I already regretted the one go I had..."

I held up both my hands to stop him. "I don't think I want to hear that."

He laughed, high and cold, I shuddered.

"She doesn't look at you like she regretted it."

"Poor girl believes to be in love with me. It's ridiculous."

My eyes searched his face for any honest pity or even sympathy but I only found hollow amusement. I scoffed. "I wouldn't have thought you to be like that."

"Like what?"

"Like..." I didn't have the words for it. It shocked me that he was so... so cold, so unscrupulous. I had known it all the time; it just shocked me that I had to admit it now. "Forget about it."

Malfoy, Nott and Avery sat down around us and Abraxas grinned at me. "So I heard you finally broke up with Hitchin?"

"What's your excuse not to like him?"

"Never made the effort to investigate on his blood status, huh?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Now, why would I?"

"Because his mother is a bloody muggle and his older brother is a damn Squib."

I wanted to say that I didn't give a damn about his blood status or about whether or not his brother was magical. But I saw the look on Tom's face and I decided that it wasn't worth it. "Well, then I can be happy to be rid of him, can't I?"

The others laughed and Nott lightly punched my arm as to symbolize camaraderie.

* * *

Tom and I were sitting outside. The warm sun of spring was grazing my face and I felt... fine. For the first time since quite long. Fabian had caused a terrible scene, telling me I was just "a Slytherin's slut", insulting me for associating with "those fanatics" and expressing his regret for ever having touched me. Now, my head resting comfortably on Tom's lap, I felt fine. Relaxed. Even a little happy.

"Aren't you ever afraid?"

"Afraid of what?"

"Death."

I frowned and sat up to look him in the face. "Of death? Merlin, Tom, I'm barely fifteen..."

"Are you, or are you not?"

"No, I'm not. Besides, I do believe that... well. We all have to die. And it obviously doesn't end there, right? The ghosts have made their choice..."

He scoffed. "I'm never going to die."

I laughed nervously. "Come on, Tom, you're smarter than that."

"No, no, I'm serious. I'll find a way."

I frowned. All this talking about death and – Merlin's beard – achieving immortality scared me. "Stop it, now. You shouldn't talk about these things, Tom."

* * *

"Slughorn wants to meet tomorrow; he's got some guy from Puddlemere United."

"Really?" I asked. Quidditch just bored me.

"Come on, that's something. Famous Quidditch player..."

I just shrugged and Tom looked at me in disbelief. "You shouldn't tell that Malfoy. Or Nott, you hang out with them quite often latest time..."

"Any problem with that?"

We were interrupted by a rather small girl in Slytherin uniform. She was pretty, but I could tell by the way that she looked at Tom that her self-confidence was at rock bottom.

"Tom?"

He sighed and shot me an apologetic glance. "What is it, love?"

"I... uhm... I..."

"I told you it was only that one time, right?"

I raised an eyebrow. He was really incredible. Poor girl.

"I know, but..."

"Take a hint."

"TOM!" He glared at me, but I knew that I had done the right thing interfering.

"Don't worry, love, it's nothing personal," I told the girl. "He does that with every girl. You should choose more carefully."

She was close to tears. "But..."

Tom grunted. "I told you to leave me alone."

I sighed heavily. "It's not your fault, you know? He's just a jerk."

Finally, the girl was able to move; she ran down the corridor and disappeared behind the next corner.

"That was a bad one. I need to choose better."

I turned to glare at Tom. "Please tell me she was older than twelve!"

"She's third year, don't panic."

I shook my head. "You really are incredible."

"Oh, I know."

I very much felt like slapping him, but I pulled myself together. "Why don't you just search for a real girlfriend, huh?"

"What would be the point in that?"

"It would be normal. And you wouldn't hurt these little girls you're always playing with." I leant back against the wall like I had before.

"That's just it. I love a good game."

"You're abhorrent."

He shrugged. "You're still standing here with me."

Standing was a nice circumscription. As soon as I had leant against the wall, he had put one hand next to my shoulder, on the wall; the fingers of his other hands ran through my hair.

"Well, I'm your friend."

"So? I got a friend. I got girls. It's practically the same as if I had a girlfriend."

I scoffed and stepped away from him. "Tell Slughorn I'm sick or something. I'm not going to attend."

* * *

**Review? Maybe? Yes? Thanks!**


	6. The Heir of Slytherin

**Here I go again. Firstly, thanks to all those who read, fav'd, alerted and especially to those who reviewed!**

**Secondly, I'm going on vacation for about 2 weeks and I don't know when/if I'll able to update. I'll try, though...**

**However, here comes the next chapter; we're meanwhile in their fifth year - incredible, isn't it? Well, probably not. I'll stop rambling now.**

* * *

I opened the letter and stared at in surprise. Or, rather, not real surprise. Delightedness. Pride. I had worked for this.

"You're silent, honey, everything okay?"

"Yes, mother, sure. It's... they've appointed me prefect."

She sighed heavily. I looked up as I hadn't expected that. I had expected... well, I had expected her to be proud of me.

"What is it?"

"You're adapting pretty well, don't you?"

"Why are you asking that?"

"Because only pureblood muggle-haters have a chance in the wizarding world. Now, I know you're not a fanatic like them. So, you gotta be adapting rather well."

I jumped up and snapped: "Why, yes, obviously I am."

* * *

"So, what do I hear about you and that Smith guy?"

"I can't imagine that you heard anything about that – it lasted so short, even I have barely heard about it."

"And you've called me abhorrent."

I looked at Tom. He had changed over the summer; he was a lot taller than I remembered him. I couldn't believe that we just started our fifth year! It felt like everything was going to end so very soon – what would we all do without Hogwarts? Without the mighty walls protecting us against the evils of the outside world? I sighed. All that Grindelwald-paranoia was already taking me over.

"You're not abhorrent."

"Oh, thank you. I'm charmed."

"Don't be silly."

"I've signed you in to do the rounds with me, I'm sure that's fine with you?"

Of course, he had been appointed prefect, just like me. I had reckoned with that; anything else would've been pure stupidity.

"I'd rather you ask me the next time, but sure."

"Perfect."

* * *

We've patrolled through the corridors and we didn't find anybody. This early in the year, most of the students still took bed-times seriously. And nobody was sneaking out to finish an essay or the other in the library last minute.

"What did your parents say? Proud that you're prefect?"

"Well, sort of."

"What do you mean?"

I shrugged. "They believe that anybody who is in charge in the wizarding world is just a pureblood-fanatic."

"And now they take you for a pureblood-fanatic?"

The idea of it was so absurd, we both had to laugh.

"No," I muttered. "But they believe I'm... just adapting. Saying nothing against it."

"Well, they're right."

"I'm hanging out too much with you folk, that's just it."

He shrugged. "I'm not going to tell you what I think about mud..."

"TOM!"

"Muggle-borns, sorry."

I nodded. In front of his "friends", or rather servants I would never say anything against it, but I wouldn't keep my rejection of this racism hidden when we were alone.

"Okay, so... any news from you over the summer?"

Tom shrugged. "Not really. Mrs. Cole is still the same stupid cow..."

"Tom," I protested softly, but I knew how deeply he hated the head of the orphanage.

"I don't think my father was a wizard," he suddenly said.

I frowned. All these years, he had been of the certain belief that his father was the magical one, as his mother died with his birth.

"Why do you think so?"

"I've been searching the trophy room, prefect lists... everything. He has never attended Hogwarts. No one with the name Riddle ever did."

I sighed. "So it's your mother, then. Impossible that you're a muggle-born."

"Right."

I stopped and looked at him. "Anything to go after?"

He sighed. "My second name. Marvolo."

"Your grandfather's name, I suppose."

"Yeah, right."

"Sounds like a wizard's name, in fact..."

He sighed again, heavily. "This is no good."

"This is just the way it is, Tom; you can't change where you come from. You can just change where you're going."

He took a step towards me. I raised an eyebrow and suddenly, his lips touched mine. I gasped in surprise. To my even greater surprise, I felt myself giving in, responding to his kiss. Shocked, I pulled away.

"We can't go there, Tom."

He smiled sadly. "I just decided to change where I was going."

I raised an eyebrow. "I'll never be one of your..."

"I didn't ask you to, did I?"

I stared at him. "We're going to ruin it, you know that?"

"What are we going to ruin? You told me to search for a girlfriend. Why would I want to be with any other girl than with you? You're already my best friend."

"Tom...," I muttered. It wasn't that I... that I didn't _want_ it. I was just so scared to lose him.

Suddenly, his lips were on mine again, soft and sweet. I could tell he tried hard to be gentle.

He smiled at me as he pulled away. "You're talking way too much."

* * *

"My father found something."

Tom stared at me in surprise and I tried a weak smile. He wouldn't like this.

"Look, you know he worked for the Department of Magical Law Enforcement at the Ministry?"

Tom nodded.

"He still got some connections and I had him ask for anyone with the name Marvolo. We only found this."

I showed him the copy of what my father had received. It was the judgement for a man called Marvolo Gaunt, back from 1938, then living in Little Hangleton. He had been imprisoned in Azkaban for six months because he had insulted and attacked a Ministry agent.

"Marvolo Gaunt," he whispered and I nodded.

"My dad also found this," I handed him another paper. "Obviously, his son was even worse. Attacking muggles that lived in the village... he was imprisoned for three years."

Tom read through it and handed it back. "That has nothing to do with me. We're searching for my mother."

"Yeah, about that. My father has talked to the agent insulted. He said they lived under very poor conditions, but proud of their pureblood heritage. And he said, there was a daughter, supposedly a Squib. She was old enough to be left alone with all her family in Azkaban. Still, no one has ever heard of her again."

He stared at me. "A Squib?" he whispered and I shrugged.

"I don't know. Sometimes, magical abilities don't show when suppressed. But it's possible, is it? Just imagine, now left alone, she found a muggle whom she loved – a Tom Riddle, and she got you. Only when her father returned from prison, her now husband would of course find out that she was magical – no matter if she was a Squib or not – and he left her. Your mother would run off..."

"And die giving birth to me."

I nodded.

"That's possible."

I sensed that he didn't like it at all; I sensed that he felt miserable. And I felt the incredible need to comfort him. But how could I ever? He was Tom Riddle. He would never admit that he was hurt.

"Tom," I muttered and reached out to touch him, but he caught my hand before it reached his face.

"Would you mind leaving me alone for a bit?"

I looked at him, worried, but I nodded. Obeyed.

* * *

"I always knew you would get together."

"Why did it take you so long to tell us?"

"I just..." I didn't really know what to say. I had kept it from them because I hadn't been entirely sure that it worked out. I wanted to keep things normal – so that I had a chance to go back. I sighed. After all, there was no going back anymore. "I don't know."

"I knew it from first year," Olive stated. "I'm not that bad in divination after all."

Lydia laughed. "Honestly. This has nothing to do with future-telling. It was plain obvious."

I blushed slightly and shook my head in disbelief. I had feared their reaction – a talk about how bad Slytherins were for me, maybe or even worse. But they just... seemed to find it funny.

"LORRAINE!"

He rushed through the corridor and I turned around just in time, as he grabbed me and pulled me away from Olive and Lydia. I heard them giggle.

He pushed me into an empty classroom and locked the door. Suddenly his lips crashed on mine. After a few moments, I pulled back, chuckling. "What's up?"

"It's fantastic."

"What?"

"Remember the Gaunts? Marvolo and his son? The supposedly Squib daughter?"

"Sure, I do."

He nodded. "I did some research. The Gaunts are the last living descendants of Salazar Slytherin."

My eyes widened. "Merlin's beard..."

"Right. They would all speak the Parseltongue! Just like me – and even though I'm half-blood, I was sorted into Slytherin with the hat barely touching my hat! That fits!"

"You mean... then you would be the heir of Slytherin?"

* * *

**There we go. Rather short chapter, sorry... still leave a review?**


	7. Chamber Of Secrets

**So, hey, I'm a little late, but I did it! I just borrowed a hotel staff member's laptop to update (in Italian, quite an adventure ;))  
**

**Anyhow, thanks to all those who read, fav'd, alerted and especially to those who reviewed! On with the chapter!  
**

* * *

"Tom, can I talk to you?"

He looked up and eyed me with a rather neutral expression, then he nodded.

"Avery, Rosier, leave."

They jumped up and practically bowed. "My lord."

The two of them left, leaving us alone. I stared at Tom, puzzled. "My lord?"

"Yes?"  
I chuckled nervously, trying to hide my insecurity. "I didn't realize you had a title."

He sighed heavily and pulled out his wand. "I'll show you, alright?"

He waved and letters appeared, writing his name in the air in burning green. TOM MARVOLO RIDDLE. He smirked and waved his wand again. The letters started moving and found another place. I AM LORD VOLDEMORT.

I stared at the letters and then I started laughing. He frowned and the letters disappeared. "Lord Voldemort? Seriously?"

"What's so funny about it?"

"It's just plain stupid. You've been juggling with the letters and that was the best you came up with."

He growled but didn't answer me.

"So, now you're little slaves all accepted to call you _my lord_."

"Maybe you should, too."

I laughed once again, though this time, it was rather bitter. "Never. Believe me when I tell you, I'll _never_ call you like that."

* * *

"Did you ever hear about the Chamber of Secrets?"

I glanced at him quickly and shook my head.

"When Salazar Slytherin left Hogwarts, he created that chamber, with a monster in it that would eradicate all muggle-borns in Hogwarts. This chamber can only be opened by the heir of Slytherin. I bet you can open it with Parseltongue."

I sighed and closed the book I had been reading in. "And?"

"I, for instance, could open it..."

"And kill all muggle-borns? Great idea."

His eyes locked with mine. "There should be no mudbloods here."

"TOM!"

"What? I'm just right. They're unworthy..."

"Yeah, and you're oh so worthy, filthy half-blood that you are..."

Suddenly, he pointed his wand at me. "Don't mess with me."

"Great. You're going after blood-traitors, too, now?"

He pulled back and stared at me. "I'm... I'm sorry."

"Yeah? Splendid. I don't want you to open that chamber."

"I'll do it anyway."

Inside me, an insecure feeling of fear and despair built up. "Please don't – you don't know what's in there."  
"I bet it won't hurt me. I'm Slytherin's heir."

He turned and I jumped up to hold him back. "Please. Please, Tom, just don't... for me?"

He shook his head. "You don't get it, do you? I am the heir of Slytherin. I have to do this. It's my duty and my honour."

"You're insane," I whispered and his hands gripped my upper arms.

"No, I'm not. Muggle-borns should never have been allowed to Hogwarts. It's wrong. We're worth more than them."

I broke free, using all my force and took a step back. "You make me sick."

* * *

"Right, just like that – go crying, frog-eye!"

Myrtle, a pale brown-haired girl just two years younger than us, rushed out of the Great Hall.

"Do you always have to be that mean, Olive?" Lydia asked with a light voice.

"Why, she's annoying the hell out of me."

I didn't even bother to enter the conversation, I had mightier problems. Of course, Tom hadn't listened to me. For a few months, one muggle-born after the other was attacked. If I hadn't known better, I would have thought – like all the others – that the situation was out of control. In fact, he had it all under perfect control. He was having a bloody hell of a good time.

I saw the half-giant from Gryffindor leaving his table, carrying food. Maybe he wanted to eat on his own. He had to be a classmate of that Myrtle girl. Strange year, that one.

"Hey, look at that oaf, did you also hear he raised werewolf cubs beneath his bed?"

"No, I didn't. And don't call him an oaf. He's just... huge."

"Yeah, right, because he's half-giant."

"So?" Sometimes I was quite proud of me. Despite all this hanging out with Slytherins I had a certain amount of tolerance.

Olive shrugged. "What about Riddle? He seems to be in such a good mood."

"Oh, we believe to have found out about his family."

"Really? Shouldn't you two be all lovey-dovey and stuff?"

I shot her a quick, annoyed glance. "Did Tom ever seem to you to be that kind of guy?"

"No, but..."

"See." I stood up and muttered: "See you in Ancient Runes."

As I left the Great Hall, Tom grabbed my arm. "You didn't even say hello."

I looked around. There was no one standing near. "Right, because I'm not okay with what you're doing! Merlin, Tom, I knew the guy that was attacked yesterday..."

"Well, I knew him, too."

"You're such a jerk."

I wanted to turn around and leave, but he still held on my arm and I glared at him. "Let me go!"

"No! Why can't you understand...?"

"That you try to kill people? Just because of who they descent from, that's just stupid! You're no better than any of your Slytherin slaves..."

Quickly, he had pinned me against the wall. "You don't mean that."

"I mean every damn word of it!"

"Say that you're lying!"

"NO!"

There was this coldness in his eyes that lack of emotion that I feared the most, because I knew what it lead to.

"Tom...," I whispered, but he didn't respond. He stepped back and turned around.

"You said you loved me."

"And I do."

"Well, why are you not on my side, then?"

I didn't have any answer for this. He left in a hurry.

* * *

Olive was sobbing uncontrollably. Lydia had put her arms around her in order to give comfort, but it didn't help. I had locked my arms around my chest, trying hard not to burst out in tears. I had provoked him, I had argued with him – if I had played nice he would've stayed with me and all of this would have never happened.

Headmaster Dippet and a lot of other teachers were standing around in the bathroom and tried to figure out what happened.

I didn't even dare to look at the dead girl on the floor. I could get why Olive was crying like that – not only had she found Myrtle, already dead, but she was also the reason the girl had hidden here in first place.

"Well," Dumbledore said. "This is tragedy."

* * *

"How could you, Tom? You killed her!"

"I got a greater problem by now."

I gasped. It couldn't be true! He couldn't be that cold... "What is your problem, huh? Other than having killed an innocent girl?"

"They gonna close Hogwarts."

My mouth fell open. "No!"

I could almost see his eyes fill with tears, but he suppressed the emotion.

"I can't let that happen!"

"Then just stop it! Stop it, Tom, close that Chamber, forever!"

"It won't change anything if they don't find the monster..."

I stared at him in shock. It would be the right thing to do to just go and tell Dippet who was responsible and why. It would be the right thing to make sure Tom was never to harm anybody again. It would just be right to turn him in, but I knew I couldn't! I could never do that to him.

"Then... then they must close Hogwarts."

"I would have to go back to that damn orphanage and I won't. That's just it, I won't."

I started moving up and down in the empty classroom. "We'll have to... blame it on someone else."

"Who? Who could possibly go after mudbloods?"

"Tom," I protested softly, but it was of no use, either way. I wouldn't change what he believed anymore.

"Who? I'll blame none of my friends..."

"Friends," I scoffed. "However, it must be no one like that. It could just be a coincidence, couldn't it?"

"So, we just pick someone? Anyone?"

"We gotta make it reasonable..."

* * *

I felt horrible as I sat on the train, knowing what I shouldn't know. What should've never happened. We had found a supposedly culprit quite easily. Rubeus Hagrid, the half-giant Gryffindor. Not only was he known for raising all sorts of creatures even in the dormitories. He had hidden an Acrumantula. In the dungeons. In a cupboard. It was simple to convince everybody that it was all his fault. He didn't go to Azkaban, though – he was considered too young (and a little insane), believing the animal wouldn't hurt anybody. It seemed logical for everybody. Only Dumbledore obviously doubted Tom's description of how he had found Hagrid. After all, he had never really trusted him.

"You're awfully quiet. Everything alright?"

Nothing was alright, but I couldn't tell Lydia. (Olive had gone home earlier. The shock of finding Myrtle dead – the girl had by the way returned as a ghost – had been too much for her.)

"Sure. It was just...so much this year."

"Yeah, sure. But it's gonna be better, next year."

"If you say so."

She smiled sympathetically. "Come on. We can go back next year, the monster's gone – you have a perfectly charming and nastily handsome boyfriend."

I chuckled and she mistook it for some sign of happiness as she was supposed to.

"See. It's gonna be better. Merlin, we passed our O. !"

"Time to get working for the N.E. ."

"Do you already know what you're taking?"

"Pretty much." I was glad about the change of topic. "Potions, Charms, Transfiguration, DADA and Study of Ancient Runes." I had practically every choice – I knew I was going to meet the expectations in every subject. I was delighted to get rid of both Herbology and Muggle Studies, though. As Tom had predicted, that had bored me to no end.

"I wish I could keep up Transfiguration, but I just suck at it... I'll take Herbology, though."

"All depends on what you're gonna do with it."

"What are you gonna do with it?"

I really wished I had an answer to that.

* * *

**Review? Maybe? THANKS!**


	8. Horcruxes

**Sometimes, I make plans, such as updating in a hotel with no public computer. Then, obviously, these plans fail - and I end up about 5 days late on my updates. Granted, there are people who don't update quite so frequently, still I feel bad about it... however, now I am back home. Italy was amazing, but way to warm if you ask me.**

**Thanks to all those read, fav'd, alerted and especially to those who reviewed.**

**On we go with the story.**

* * *

The knock on my window had me wide awake in less than a second. I sat up straight. My eyes ghosted over to the window and my lips parted slightly. It couldn't be possible. I got up - bare feet on a cold floor - and opened the window.

"What are you doing here?"

"Will you let me in, I'll explain."

Tom didn't even wait for me to step aside, he simply climbed in.

"Tom, you... my parents!"

He pulled out his wand and pointed it to the wall. "_Muffliato."_

He turned back around to me. "I won't go back there, Lorraine, I can't – please. I know I ask much of you, but could you... could I? Please let me stay for a while."

I stared at him, unable to say anything. And what? I couldn't deny him this wish. But I couldn't just say it was okay. My parents... they would so be not okay with it. "I..."

He had stepped closer and suddenly his lips were on mine. The feeling was exceptional – I just realized how much I missed him even the past few weeks. I felt myself melt into his embrace. I felt myself giving in. As he pulled away, I muttered: "Alright. Okay. I'll talk to them. You can stay."

* * *

I stared at the newspaper article on my lap. It couldn't be, it couldn't be true. I had trusted him... him, the boy who just sat down in our living room, the boy who had showed up yesterday to beg me and my parents to host him, at least for two days. My parents were charmed by him from the very first moment. To them, of course, he didn't show his despise for muggles, muggle-borns and those who associate with them. Such as us.

And now this.

_MUGGLE-MURDERS SOLVED – CRAZY WIZARD CONFESSES TO BE GUILTY_

I hadn't ever thought about any infliction of Tom's with this until I fully read it.

_Morfin Gaunt (38) was already imprisoned for three years because of hexing a Muggle. When confronted, he freely confessed to have murdered three Muggles, namely T., Th. and M. Riddle in Little Hangleton, North England._

There was too much of a coincidence as to it being just that. I knew what he had done; I simply knew it.

I jumped on my feet, grabbing the newspaper and running down the stairs. I knew my parents were not at home, they had gone out shopping with my younger siblings. Tom had just requested for some time to lie down. I wouldn't grant him the favour.

I busted into the room and threw the newspaper at his feet. "TELL ME IT'S NOT TRUE!"

He looked at me, calmly and picked the article up, his face without emotion while he read through it. "Seems like my uncle's never changed."

"Don't try to fool me, Tom!"

He sighed heavily and put it down. "What do you want to hear, huh? That I'm sorry?"

"I want the truth." I was close to tears.

He stood up and stretched out his arm, but I flinched. "Don't touch me."

"Alright then. I went there and I met my sucking uncle, mentally disabled, almost killing me just for approaching him, until the moment that I talk to him in Parseltongue."

"And?"

"Well, he told me most interesting story about my mother and my filthy, unworthy asshole of a father who left her alone while pregnant, with no money at all. So I..."

"So you went and killed your father and your grandparents, for what? Revenge?"

"Right!"

By now, I was crying for good. "And again, you blamed an innocent! What did you do? Changing his memory..."

"Yeah, and?"

I took several steps back. "I don't even know you anymore, Tom!"

"It's Lord Voldemort, you know?"

I laughed bitterly. "Never, never will I call you like that!"

I saw something glowing in his eyes, was it hurt? Injured pride? At least he was sad. Of course, I was giving in right that minute. He had to suffer from what he had done!

I moved to him and caressed his arms. "You'll always be Tom to me, that's just it... I'm still on your side, you know?"

* * *

"Riddle honestly spent the holidays with you?"

"Yeah. He showed up the third week and then stayed. Truth be told, my parents loved him."

Lydia shook her head. "My parents would've never allowed it."

"Beg you. It's not like he slept in my room."

"Not?" Olive seemed a little disappointed. She was very pale. Myrtle obviously had decided to haunt her, seen as Olive had often bullied her – even the day that she died.

"No, he did not."

"So, you still haven't slept with him?"

"Olive, please."

"Now, come on. Of course I'm interested."

I shook my head in disbelief. "This is really none of your business."

"Tell you what, Lydia. This is supposed to mean _yes, I actually did sleep with him_."

"It's not supposed to mean that!" I snapped and got up, marching out of the common room.

"Lorrie! Lorrie, come back!"

I rushed down the staircase and through some corridors until I finally leant against a wall. I felt like I was trapped. Trapped with my sick-making-curious friends, trapped with my murdering boyfriend, trapped with my fucking life.

I stayed where I was and fought the tears, until suddenly I heard footsteps and I looked up.

"Malfoy! What are you doing up here?"

"Was just headed for the Ravenclaw tower. Lord... Tom told me to give that to you."

I glared at him – for almost saying _Lord Voldemort_ – but took the small package and the note attached to it.

"He said I should make it clear that this is most valuable and you should watch it very carefully."

I unwrapped it and found a ring in it. It looked very old, like one of these things that were passed on through generations. It really was rather beautiful. I unfolded the note and read. _For all the times I didn't have something to give you – consider this a part of me that's always with you._ I frowned. Why would he give me something so precious – both in a material and in an emotional way – just like that. For no obvious reason at all?

"Tell him I said _thank you_. And I'll keep it safe."

He nodded gravely and turned around to leave. I stared at the ring in my hand and suddenly I knew what to do with it.

* * *

"_No, it's impossible!"_

_"Is it?"  
_

_"She just said that for me to stay!"  
_

_"Well, obviously you were wrong."  
_

_The man fell on his knees before me. "Please... please, don't."  
_

_I wouldn't be merciful, though. I would do as I had planned, nothing could keep me from it. "AVADA KEDAVRA!"_

_A green flash enlightened the room and the man fell backwards._

I gasped and sat up, my hand instinctively searching for the ring that I wore around my neck with a chain. Like this, I was always hiding it; keeping it safe like he wanted me to, but still I kept it close. Close to my heart.

I looked around and found that no one had noticed my waking up. The Silencio-Charms around the beds worked perfectly, as always. Ever since he had given me this ring I was having all kinds of dreams... as if I – as if I wasn't myself. But it couldn't be right? Why would the ring do that? And why would Tom want me to have something like that?

* * *

"What's that your reading?"

"Of no importance."

"Come on. You got that one from the restricted section. I'm not even sure you're allowed to read that."

"Of course I am, and now would you please drop it?"

I sat down across from him and sighed heavily. "No reason to hide, you know? I won't go and hand you over. Although I could."

He glared at me, but I just smiled at his death-stare. He was the one to have murdered several people, not me.

"You won't, though."

"Naturally."

His eyes were still fixed on mine and I tried to fight the urge to let my eyes drop to the floor. Sometimes, the look in his eyes was just too intense for me. This time, though, I won. His features softened and his glance became less threatening.

"It's really not that important, I'm just... searching for extra-information."

"Who do you want to impress, this time?"

"No one. Not that kind of extra-information."

I frowned, but he wouldn't give me any details. It was of no use to inquire farther when he got like this. All tied up and keeping things to himself.

"Why didn't you give me the ring on your own?"

His eyes flashed up again. "I was busy."

"What a compliment."

"It was urgent to me that you get it and I couldn't go. Prefect duties and stuff. So I ordered Malfoy to do it."

I smirked at him.

"What?"

"You _ordered_ Malfoy to do it. So much for friends."

He looked confused and I had to laugh at his puzzled expression.

"You know, usually I ask my friends to do me favour. I don't order them."

"Merlin, will you just leave me alone?"

I sighed heavily and got up. "Of course, master, however you please."

He glared at my sarcastic statement, but I didn't care. He was no fun in this kind of mood.

* * *

"_Now listen up, you moron, if you think you can scare us with your silly stick, then you..."  
_

_"CRUCIO!" I didn't have the patience for this. I could tell by the horrified looks of his family that they believed me now. I released the curse and whispered: "That was because I was never good enough for you. __AVADA KEDAVRA!"_

_A green flash enlightened the room and the man fell backwards. The scream of his wife echoed through the room._

I woke up, screaming myself. How could that be? What could it mean? I felt for the chain around my neck. It had to be it, there was no other explanation. I had to something about this and I had to do it soon.

* * *

"What's it about this ring? What does it do?"

He stared at me, faking surprise, but I saw through his disguise. "What do you mean?"

"Don't take me for a fool, Tom. I know it's something special – I've been having these dreams, you see..."

He frowned, then he caught my arm and dragged me out of the entry hall, into some corridor in the dungeons. I didn't object. He didn't want to be overheard, what probably meant that he was going to tell me the truth. "What kind of dreams?"

"I see... it's as if I look through someone else's eyes. I _murder_ people, Tom. Every night, these dreams keep coming back..."

"You murder people?"

"Yes," I whispered. "It's some form of magic, isn't it? It's not just jewellery. Tell me what this is about."

"I can't."

My eyes narrowed. "Very well then." With one swift move, I ripped the chain of my neck and threw it into the darkness ahead of us. "You can keep it to yourself."

His face held a look of pure horror as he turned around and whispered: _"Lumos!_" It didn't take him long to find it and get it off the floor. He checked if it was still whole, his face expressing genuine fear and worry.

"How dare you," he whispered. "I told you, it's a part of me."

I stared at him. Naturally, I had taken this as a metaphor. "What are you hinting at?"

His eyes fixed on mine. "I told you I would become immortal."

I shook my head. "You can never be immortal."

"I can. This very ring contains a part of my soul. For it's outside my body I cannot die."

I kept on shaking my head, as my eyes started to fill with tears. "It's not true. That can't be."

"It is very true, I'm afraid. It's a horcrux."

"No."

"I murdered my father and I ripped my soul apart! I put that part in this very ring."

I backed off. "No... no, no. You can't have."

"I have. And it's not the only one."

My back hit the cold wall behind me. "What... what else?"

"The diary you gave me."

Tears were streaming down my face. "Who? Who did you kill for that?"

"Myrtle. I transformed the diary and now it has the ability to possess whoever confides in it. The Chamber will open again when time is due."

His voice was soft, almost gentle. He moved towards me, but stopped as I flinched.

"Why? Why did you give it to me?"

"For safekeeping." He ignored my warning glare and he stepped in front of me to whip my tears away. "And because – you already have my heart. You should have a part have my soul, too."

* * *

**Before people come and tell me about this last sentence being completely OOC, I want to remind you that Tom's a highly manipulative person and that I imagine that he tells her what he thinks she wants to hear. The way I imagine it, I guess.**

**Reviews make my day. Just saying.**


	9. There Is No Good Or Evil

**So, here I go again. First, I'm starting to work tomorrow and have to attend sort of a holiday camp for children for TEN WHOLE DAYS. A dream come true. However, I'm getting paid, right? That means that I won't be able to update, so I'm doing that now and first thing when I'm back again. Or rather the second, third, or... well, I'm going to hurry ;)**

**Thanks to all those who read, alerted and especially to those who reviewed. On we go.**

* * *

"You need to speak to him again, eventually."

My eyes suddenly focused on Lydia. She was sitting next to me while we listened to the Professor elaborating on a very uncommon Rune. I decided it was not worth paying attention.

"I don't need to do anything, actually."

I felt the ring underneath my clothing, touching bare skin. I had taken it back, of course. It was a _part of Tom's freaking soul_, after all. Despite that, I refused to talk to him ever since he had told me.

"But you love him! And he loves you!"

I sighed heavily. Was she that naive? Still too young, too inexperienced to get that it was not simple, not rainbows and unicorns all the time? Or was it just not...not obvious?

"It is not that easy."

"I don't get it. See, when Adrian and I get into a fight, we just have to..."

"That's not quite the same!" After all, her pitiful excuse of a boyfriend didn't want to create horcruxes.

She flinched a little, obviously hurt.

"I'm sorry, Lydia, I just... I don't quite know what to do about it and I don't want to talk about it."

"Yeah, right, I get that. Why don't you just try and make it up?"

How? He had given me a part of his soul and hadn't bothered to tell me in the first place. "As I said. It's not that easy."

* * *

"Please, Lorraine, please, just listen... oh come on!"

He ran and suddenly appeared right in front of me. I froze and looked at him questioningly.

"Please just let me explain."

"What's there to explain?" I looked around and luckily the corridor was empty. "You split your soul and you created this hor-whatever by murder. You murdered them on purpose so that you could live forever! That's simply evil."

"There is no good and evil. There is only power and those too weak to seek it."

I shook my head and wanted to move past him, but he caught my arm and held me back.

"Where do you have it? Is it safe?"

My eyes fixed on his. "It's where it always was."

His slender fingers touched my neck and then he pulled on the chain until he could see the ring. "Why do you still wear it if it's making you have these dreams?"

"It's alright as soon as I put it off. I don't sleep with it no more. I just wear it during the day. For safekeeping," I added bitterly.

Before I could even blink, he had pushed me against the wall and his lips were on mine. I didn't really know how it happened, but I gave in, melting into his touch. His tongue softly trailed over my bottom lip and I allowed him to deepen the kiss. After a few moments he pulled away and rested his forehead against mine. "Will you ever forgive me?"

I sighed heavily. "Probably."

* * *

"Hey there," I muttered. "Is that seat still free?"

He looked up at me, puzzled at first and then he grinned. His expression changed at once, though, as he glared at Nott, who at once moved out of the way.

"Thank you, Nott," I barely whispered as I sat down next to Tom on Slytherin table.

"So?" Malfoy asked from across the table. "Did you come to make amends?"

Tom just glared at him and his gaze dropped to his plate at once.

"Hardly," I answered, finally finding the courage to speak up. "But I wouldn't discuss that with you, Malfoy."

"I'm quite pleased by the sudden change of mind, though," Tom whispered in my ear. "Why?"

I shrugged and let my eyes fix on Lydia and her petty little boyfriend. Weren't they just cute?

More than anything, I had needed my old life back. When I didn't speak to Tom, I didn't only lose my boyfriend. I lost my best friend, too. "Time heals all wounds."

He scoffed and leant away. "What a stupid thing to say when your life can easily end just the next moment."

I glared at him. "Well, that's the beauty of it, actually."

His followers – excuse me, friends – seemed confused by our conversation and I realized he hadn't told them. He hadn't even told Abraxas, when he had brought me the ring, that it in fact contained a part of his soul. I wondered. Why didn't he give it to me himself then? Why did he let me have it, after all?  
He looked curiously at me, as if he couldn't understand me at all.

* * *

"Hey! Hey, Riley, wait a sec'!"

I turned around and saw Malfoy coming towards me. "What is it?"

"I need some advice from you."

I frowned. "You need some advice? From me?"

"Yeah right."

I turned again and I started walking again. Malfoy kept my pace. "Do you know that girl?" He pointed at a rather plain girl in a group of fifth-year Slytherins. "Irene Yaxley. I... well, how should I put it?"

I rolled my eyes. "I got it. If you need some advice on how to lure a girl into your bed, go ask Tom. He's got expertise in the matter."

He grabbed my wrist. "No. I don't want... well, I don't only want to have her in my bed, you see? I really like her. She's..." He sighed, his eyes locked once again on Irene Yaxley. "Ain't she a beauty?"

The fact that she was in fact rather average convinced me that he was serious.

"Alright then. What did you do until now?"

"Paid some compliments. But she didn't seem to like that."

"Well, she probably thinks you just want to..."

"But I don't!"

"Right, right, I got that."

He fell silent while his eyes lingered almost shyly on my face.

I sighed heavily. "Look, Malfoy, this is what we are gonna do..."

* * *

I sat in the library with Tom, discussing Charms homework. He was absolutely not of my opinion and actually we had some kind of fight on how much water a simple _Aguamenti_-Charm could produce.

We were finally interrupted by a cheering Abraxas Malfoy who fell down on a chair across the table. "It worked! It actually worked; she agreed to go to Hogsmeade with me!"

I smiled at him, acknowledging his success. "Tell me more."

"Oh – I asked and... she smiled. And she actually blushed."

"Told you more subtle compliments would flatter her more."  
Tom had leant back in his chair and eyed us with amusement.

"I still need your help, though," Malfoy continued. "I really don't want to ruin it."

"Ah, no problem. Just don't rush it."

I started explaining about how he should behave - gentlemanly gestures and stuff - and Malfoy sucked in every single word. It was most fascinating.

He took off in a hurry after I finished and I turned back to Tom, who smirked at me.

"You know. Not every girl wants a gentleman. You for instance would only laugh at me if I held the door up for you."

"We are quite a different case, actually. But she's that kind of girl. I mean – seriously. She's not that pretty; she's never the centre of attention. This is why she'll simply _love_ it if she's being treated like that."

He smirked, leaned in and quickly brushed his lips over mine. "You really are a wicked witch."

I sighed. "I'm just helping a friend."

"Abraxas Malfoy? A friend? I remember that first Potion class back when we were in our first year."

"Yeah, well? That was long ago, wasn't it? I hang out too much with you guys, Merlin, I start befriending with Slytherins."

He smirked. "You've done far worse than just_ befriending_ a Slytherin."

I scoffed. "You and I were friends before you even knew what Slytherin was."

He growled and something flickered in his eyes. For one little moment I believed his eyes turned red. I was going insane.

"What? What did I say to upset you, huh?"

"I just don't like being reminded of... well. Everything that links me to the muggle world."

I leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek. "Trust me. I know no one who is less a muggle than you are."

* * *

**I'm tired of asking for reviews. Makes me seem real desperate.**


	10. Purebloods Stick Together

**I'm back! It wasn't half as bad as I had thought, in fact I had a rather good time :) Never mind that, now, I do update now.**

**Thanks to all those who read, fav'd, alerted and to those who reviewed. I mean it, you guys are great.**

* * *

"Why again do we have to attend this stupid wedding?"

"It's not stupid and her brother had her parents invite me."

"Don't try to hide it. She invited you herself."

Tom barely scoffed and I hurried after him. I knew that Lucretia had probably seen to it herself that he was invited, but I didn't exactly mind. Though she couldn't invite me, obviously, blood-traitor that I supposedly was, she had insinuated to Tom to bring me along.

"I beg you to be nice and – adapt, as you like to put it. See, she only marries once her life."

"Are you actually caring about someone else? Tom Marvolo Riddle, I am impressed."

He glared at me but didn't respond as in this very minute Orion, Cygnus and Alphard stepped in front of us. Cygnus and Orion were actually younger than us, barely fifteen and yet, I could see the same devotion to Tom in their eyes as I saw it in Malfoy's, Nott's or Lestrange's eyes. Alphard was quite a different case, though, and I flashed him a warm smile. By the way his hands gripped my waist even tighter, almost painful, I knew Tom had seen it.

"My lord, it's nice of you to attend. Lucretia will be happy."

"Hope so," Tom muttered and passed the Blacks, still dragging me along.

"Now, darling, I thought we should be play nice?"

He glared at me. "I want you to stay with me and keep away from _them_."

"My, that's sweet. You're jealous."

He growled and let go of me. "I think you understood me."

"And I think you know I'm not one of your little slaves that you can order around. I'll be wherever I want to be."

He didn't say anything more, but turned around and stormed off, somewhere in the direction of the parlour, I guessed. I sighed heavily and thought about following him, when suddenly Alphard appeared before me.

"Man, he's really kind of possessive, ain't he?"

I shrugged. "From time to time."

"What do your grandparents say? He's not exactly what I'd call from a respectable pureblood family."

If only he knew. "Well, they don't really know. And you're probably right, they wouldn't approve."

He rolled his eyes. "You know, sometimes I think your parents are getting it right. This whole pureblood-supremacy stuff is just daft."

I chuckled. "Couldn't agree more."

"Come on, I'll show you something. My father's incredibly proud to have that."

He led me into a room nearby and showed me the wall. It was covered by a large family tree. My eyes wandered over the faces and names. I found all the Blacks I knew in the lowest row.

"Wow," I muttered.

"Yeah right. All the Blacks for several generations. As pureblood as you can be, I guess... see? _Toujours pur__._ It's French, meaning..."

"Always pure," I whispered.

"Right," Alphard muttered, obviously surprised that I knew my French so well.

My eyes still wandered over the family tree and then something suddenly caught my attention. Cedrella Black didn't have a face. All that was there was a burn mark.

"What happened there?"

"Oh," murmured Alphard. "You see..."

My eyes wandered over the tapestry once again and now I found several of these black spots. Marius Black – a burnt spot. Isla Black – no face. Phineas Black – only a black mark.

"My mother blasted them off."

I frowned and turned to watch him. "But why?"

"Well. For being blood-traitors. Marrying muggle-borns or... unworthy wizards. My uncle Marius, though, he's simply a Squib, that's why..."

"And she really just blasted them off? Just like that?"

He shrugged. "Yeah, well, just like that."

I sighed heavily. In fact, this was really horrible. "I guess if my grandmother had a family tree like that – she would've done it, too."

* * *

"Can you believe that? They actually _blasted them off_ the wall! So much for family! Aren't Slytherins supposed to be loyal?"

He looked at me without any emotion showing on his face. "Well, I suppose so. And I should think those who were blasted off were those who were disloyal."

"Disloyal?" I gasped. "That one man – he was a Squib. What's disloyal about him, it's just the way he was born..."

"A Squib, Lorraine? I wouldn't want to have one in my family."

I stared at him and then I realized what was behind his calm behaviour. "You're still mad at me."

"Why, yes of course I am!"

"For what, I may ask? I never gave you any reason for jealousy."

He growled. "It's the way that Black guy looks at you – and you encourage him..."

"I don't encourage anything. Don't you trust me enough, Tom, to know I'd never leave you for someone else?"

His eyes met mine. It was as if he tried to read my every thought in them. "What would you leave me for, then?"

I touched his cheek. "Nothing, I didn't... why would I leave you, after all? I love you."

He stared blankly at me and then got up from the couch. "I suppose I better start packing. The train leaves early tomorrow."

And then he was gone. I remained, staring into nothing. I knew these words were never going to pass his lips. Why did I have to say that?

* * *

"You attended Lucretia Black's wedding?" asked Lydia incredulously. "Why?"

"I was invited, that's why."

Lydia and Olive stared at me, as uncomprehending as my parents had when I had told them. "Doesn't necessarily mean you have to join these racists."

"I didn't join _these racists_. Actually, I accompanied Tom."

"Where's the difference?"

I gave Olive a cold look. I hated it when she talked bad of Tom. Maybe, because I was afraid she would see through him and give him away. I frowned. Shouldn't I be happy about at least one girl who didn't fancy _my_ boyfriend at this goddamn school?

"Difference is, I didn't go because purebloods stick together or something. I went because my boyfriend asked me to."

"About him. How's he doing?"

"Fine. He's been appointed Head Boy..."

"Along with you? What a coincidence."

I glared at her. I had had no doubt that I would be appointed Head Girl. Tom and I were the best students of our year, after all.

"Yeah, along with me. Which is why I'm going now. I just stopped by, we have a meeting with the prefects in about ten minutes."

"Then hurry," Olive said sarcastically. "Tommy will be mad if you're late."

Sometimes I wondered why I hadn't already killed her. I got up and left the compartment to march through the train. Half-way I met Orion Black, Slytherin prefect fighting with Cassandra Ashton, his Gryffindor counterpart.

"Shut up, filthy Mudblood!"

"How dare you, Black! _Stupe..._"

"_Expelliarmus!_" I yelled and both their wands flew at me. I let them fall to the floor with a clashing sound.

"I expect you both to pull yourselves together. You can be happy that the school year hasn't yet started."

"But he...," Ashton started to protest, but I cut her off.

"I know what he said. You'll stop insulting classmates, Black and you, Ashton, will stop cursing them. No, come on, we're already late for the meeting."

* * *

"Sir, is it true that Professor Merrythought is retiring?"

"I'd like to know where you get your information. More knowledgeable than half the staff you are."

Lestrange and Avery began to laugh, but I kept to a slight smile.

"Now, Tom, I couldn't tell you if I knew, could I? By the way, thank you for the pineapple. You're quite right, it is my favourite."

This time, I had to laugh and some of the others joined me in my amusement.

"But how did you know?"

"Intuition."

Slughorn smiled and then suddenly, he looked at a clock. "Good gracious, is it that time, already? Off you go, all of you. Lestrange, I want that essay on my desk by tomorrow, or it's detention. Same goes for you, Avery."

I got up and wanted to leave, but Tom held me back. "Stay with me. I have a question," he muttered into my ear.

"Why do you need me, then?" I whispered harshly.

"Be charming."

Slughorn turned around and eyed us suspiciously. "Tom, Lorraine? Look sharp. Don't want to be caught out of bed after hours."

Tom didn't answer straight away, he seemed to hesitate. I tried not to show my concern as this was most unusual for him.

"Is something on your mind?"

"Yes, sir... you see. I couldn't think of anyone else to go to... the other professors, well – they're not like you. They might misunderstand." He interrupted himself and threw an acted insecure look in my direction. "You don't mind if she stays? I promised to walk her to her common room later on."

"But couldn't she..." Slughorn asked confusedly.

"'Course I could, Sir," I muttered. Tom wanted me to stay. I decided to play along. "But you see... I don't like wandering through the dark alone..."

He didn't question me no farther. It would've been strange if he did. "Go on," Slughorn sighed.

"I was in the library the other night," Tom started. "In the Restricted Section and I read something rather odd about a bit of rare magic... and I thought, perhaps, you could illuminate me. It's called, as I understand... a horcrux."

I stared at Tom in bewilderment. Why would he risk revealing any of his plans to a teacher? And what did he want to learn?

"I beg your pardon?"

"Horcrux. I came across the term while reading and I didn't fully understand it."

"I'm not sure what you were reading, Tom, but this is very dark stuff. Very dark indeed."

"Which is why I came to you."

"Well... well, it can't hurt to give you an overview, of course. Just so that you understand the term. A horcrux is the word used for an object in which a person has concealed part of their soul."

I joined Tom, who was standing by the fireside, much closer to Slughorn than I had, while Tom asked: "I don't quite understand how that works, sir."

"Well, you split your soul, you see, and hide part of it in an object outside the body. Then, even if one's body is attacked, or destroyed, one cannot die, for part of the soul remains earthbound and undamaged. But, of course, existence in such a form – few would want it, very few. Death would be preferable."

I decided to interrupt because I saw that hunger for information in Tom and I sure as hell didn't want Slughorn to _hear_ it. "But how do you do it?"

"By an act of evil – the supreme act of evil. By committing murder. Killing rips the soul apart. The wizard intent upon creating a horcrux would use the damage to his advantage: he would encase the torn portion..."

"Can you only split the soul once?" Tom asked and I stared at him. Now he was really giving too much away. "For instance, isn't seven a powerful magical number..."

"Seven? Merlin's beard, Tom! Isn't it bad enough to consider killing _one_ person? To rip the soul into seven pieces..." He stared at his favourite student and then suddenly became somewhat nervous. "This is all hypothetical, isn't it? All academic?"

Tom flashed him his most charming smile. "Of course, sir. It'll be our little secret."

* * *

**Don't have anything to say, really ;)**


	11. Leaving Hogwarts

**Don't really have anything to say besides thank you, to all those who read, fav'd, alerted and reviewed, which is the most amazing thing :)**

* * *

I didn't say a word until we were far enough from Slughorn for him not to hear us. Then I stopped and turned.

"Seven? Seven horcruxes? You're going insane!"

"Hardly. I intend to make myself truly immortal. Besides, I don't want to make _seven_ horcruxes. I'll make six."

"A seven-parted soul, then? But why? You already are immortal! Where's the point in creating 4 more... 4 more murders, Tom, just think about it."

"I did."

I stared at him with wide eyes. "You really are insane! I can't have you do it, you can't... I just..."

"Would you please calm down? Keep it in perspective. If I would only create one, or two, it would be too easy for someone who found out, to simply destroy them. But seven parts – six horcruxes. No one could ever find them all. No one would ever find out the impact of what I am doing."

"You told me," I whispered. "I know everything you plan. What are you gonna do now, huh? Kill me and use my murder for the next one?"

He smirked at me lightly. "You would never try to kill me."

"And why is that?"

He smiled again. "Because you love me."

"You don't understand a bit about love." I didn't know where I took the courage from to tell him. I should've been worried that he would kill me. "There's far worse than death. I wouldn't hesitate a second to kill you if it was to save you from something worse. Because – and you got that right – I love you."

"You'd kill me?"

"That's all you heard?" I turned on my heel and wanted to go, but he grabbed my arm.

"You don't mean that, do you?"

"Did you listen to me? Of course I mean it!"

He slammed me hard against the wall and I gasped in pain. He wouldn't... would he?

"You listen to me now. You'll never dare to threaten me again, or I swear to you, I will..."

I pulled myself together and laughed at him. "Threaten you? I never threatened you."

"You're lucky we're in the middle of corridor now, or I would..."

"You would what? Kill me? Torture me? Go on, have at it. But if you don't, I'd like to go to sleep. If you don't mind, that is."

He stepped back. "See, I trust you, Lorraine. Don't play with me."

"Oh, Tommy," I muttered sarcastically and kissed him on the cheek. "I would never."

* * *

I would never know how I could've been so bold that night. It was probably some form of adrenaline rush.

I didn't even try to be angry at him this time and he let the subject drop at once when I sat down next to him in Transfiguration the next day. No talking of horcruxes anymore. I didn't want to know.

It was easy to keep distracted by all the preparations for the N.E.W.T.s and – even more important, if that was possible – what would come after them. A lot of people had their lives planned rather well. Had jobs organized in the ministry, marriages arranged... well at least those people I hang around with. When I mentioned any of that to my fellow Ravenclaws, they would only stare at me in horror.

I spent most of my time with the Slytherins, after all, as I had done for pretty much all my school years. No one bothered anymore.

"So, Abraxas, what about your plans?"

"Well – I don't exactly have an occupation, but you know – why would I need one? I'm..." He smiled, a bit insecure. "I'm marrying, though."

In his smile I could see that he was happy. "Irene?" I guessed and he nodded. I jumped up and hugged him. "That's wonderful, I'm glad for you."

"Yeah, thanks – I hope I'll see you all at the wedding, then."

We all agreed, of course.

"And, how about you, Nott?"

We chatted on for a little bit, but then got interrupted as Tom joined us.

"Lorraine? Didn't expect you here."

I got up and allowed him to kiss me on the cheek. "See, I wanted to find you and Avery here said you would join them soon, so I stayed."

"That's very nice, but we're really busy. We could meet later on..."

I smiled innocently. "My, are you hiding something from me?"

I could feel the shocked gaze of his "friends" on my back. They, too, knew that I played with the fire.

"I'm not hiding anything. We're reviewing for the N.E.W.T.s, I'll have to explain everything – it would be plain boring for you."

I thought about pushing him a little farther and say that I'd love to review with them, but I decided not to. He had this dangerous glimmer in his eyes again.

"Alright, fine. You'll find me later, then, I suppose?"

He nodded sharply and I left.

* * *

He found me much earlier than I had suspected. Only half an hour after I had left the library, a first-year tugged at my robes.

"What?"

"There's a boy outside who said I should go get you."

I smirked at the boy and stood up. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

I stepped outside and found Tom leaning against a wall. "You were quite quick reviewing after all."

"Stop the charade, we both know we weren't reviewing."

"Then enlighten me, why couldn't you tell me earlier?"

"Because I had to think about how I'd sell it to you..."

I raised an eyebrow. "Go ahead, have a try."

"Alright. See... I know which job I want."

I frowned. "What's so bad about that?"

"Nothing in general. But in this specific circumstance –"

"Get to the point."

"I'll apply for the post of Professor Merrythought. As she's retiring..."

"You want to be a teacher?" I stared at him in surprise. That didn't sound at all like him.

"Yes, I do."

"You do have a plan." I eyed him suspiciously. "What is it?"

"It's not specific yet. But I do have a plan. I'll let you in when time is due."

"I don't like it," I murmured.

"Well, I don't care!"

"Tom," I muttered warningly. "Would you please...?"

"I'll go to Professor Dippet and apply. I'm pretty good after all."

"You're not gonna get the post. You have no experience."

"I have a lot of experience!"

I laughed bitterly. "With the Dark Arts, maybe, but you wouldn't want to reveal that, would you? And with their defence – well, you don't know no more than I do."

He groaned. "Can you be a little optimistic, please?"

"I am realistic. You're not gonna get it."

He glared at me once again and stormed off. He really was in a mood these days.

* * *

The look on Tom's face was murderous.

"Let me guess," I muttered as we entered the Great Hall together. "You didn't get the job."

"Said I was too young."

"Told you so."

He didn't answer me, probably because he was so very furious. "Try for a happy face, darling, Slytherin won the House Cup after all."

The Great Hall was decorated in green and silver and nearly every Slytherin seemed to be beyond happy.

Tom shrugged. "Who else should win?"

"Don't know – maybe Ravenclaw?"

The first time this evening something like a smile crossed his features.

"You wish."

"Yeah, I do."

I sat down at Ravenclaw table next to Olive and Lydia who were in a particularly good mood.

"No school anymore," Olive cheered. "I'll finally get rid of Myrtle. No more ghost following me around."

"I wouldn't count on that," Lydia grinned. "She was quite angry."

"She's never gonna leave Hogwarts!"

I didn't bother to tell her that I was quite well informed about Myrtle's plans as I had caught her planning yesterday in the girl's lavatory. But I wouldn't ruin Olive's good mood.

* * *

Graduation ceremony felt a lot like the Sorting Ceremony in first year. We were all alphabetically called to the front and handed our certificates.

We started once again with Abbott, followed by Avery.

"It seems like forever ago and yet..."

"It lasted to short," I concluded and smiled at Tom. "You're right."

"Sometimes I think I don't want to leave."

"This is just the beginning. We'll find a real home out there."

I watched Olive go to the front and get her certificate. She smiled brightly.

"I'll miss Hogwarts."

"Me, too. But it's like everything in life – it has to end eventually."

He smirked at me and I decided not to think further on that.

Lestrange, Longbottom. My eyes followed Lydia who also smiled happily as Dippet handed her the certificate.

Then, finally. "Riddle, Tom."

Tom went upstairs flashing Dippet his brightest and most charming smile.

"Riley, Lorraine."

I went to the front and shook Dippet's hand before taking my certificate.

"I wish you good luck, Miss Riley."

"Thank you, Professor Dippet, sir."

I joined Tom again and he smiled at me. The first genuine smile from him that I had seen today. We watched as Smith and Weasley went to the front and back again.

Professor Dumbledore led us outside the Hall, through the Entrance Hall and through a corridor.

"We're leaving by boat!" I whispered as I realized where we were going.

Tom nodded slightly. I believed to see something like sadness in his eyes. He was awfully silent while the little boats slithered over the dark water. He still hadn't said anything when we climbed the train and sat down in the compartment. The first time he opened his mouth, Hogwarts was no longer in sight.

"You're crying."

I hadn't realized that tears were rolling down my face. I whipped them away with a flurry gesture. "I can't believe we're leaving for good."

"Me, too. Hogwarts was the only place where I ever felt..." His voice trailed off and I added: "Happy. The only place where we ever felt happy."

* * *

**Ugh. I hate that they have to leave! Don't you think? I would never want to go... however. I'll stop talking/writing now. Nobody cares about this anyway ;)**


	12. Albania

**This is now the first chapter where they actually out of Hogwarts... this is also the middle of my story, at least the way I have planned.**

**Therefore, I want to thank everyone who sticks with this story so far, and especially, I want to thank DamonSalvatorelover and Azura Soul Reaver, ****for reviewing almost every chapter. Thanks guys!**

* * *

"He defeated him!" I rushed into the room and practically fell into Tom's arms. "He's gone, Tom, he's gone!"

He stared at me with wide eyes and then whispered: "Who?"

"Grindelwald, stupid, he's defeated him!"

"No, no, I mean – I know who was defeated. I want to know who did it."

"What do you think, honey, Dumbledore, of course."

"Dumbledore...," murmured Tom.

I laughed at him. Impossible that he hadn't seen that one coming. "Dumbledore's the greatest wizard of our time, who else could defeat Grindelwald? It's over, Tom, finally over."

Tom sat down on the next chair available. He didn't seem as delighted as anybody else.

"What's up, huh? You look like you're sad."

"What? No, I'm..."

I stared at him. "You don't think that Grindelwald was right, do you? You won't go out there and kill Muggles for _the Greater Good_, am I right?"

"I won't kill them _for the Greater Good_. I couldn't care less about the greater good."

I backed off a little. Sometimes he honestly scared me with his talking. Probably because I believed him capable of almost anything.

"His defeat is quite fortunate for me, though."

"Fortunate? Care to enlighten me?"

"We can finally travel to Albania."

"Now?"

"In the next few days. I can't wait."

"We can't travel to Albania _now_."

"And why is that?"

"Malfoy's marrying in two weeks. I promised to attend. _You_ promised to attend."

"He can be honoured if I come and shouldn't be disappointed if I don't. I have better things to do than to congratulate my followers."

I glared at him. "I, for my part, like to stick with my promises."

"Well, I, for my part, don't."

"You can't force me to accompany you."

He smirked at me and that made me realize that it would be a risky thing not to grant him his wishes. He neither yelled nor threatened me. He was dangerously calm.

"You should think about where your loyalties are."

"You know exactly where my loyalties are," I whispered.

"Prove it. Who cares about Malfoy's wedding? You'll go to Albania with me."

"I still don't get what you want there."

"You don't need to, not yet."

"You won't murder me and bury me in secret, will you?"

"I'll think about it."

I didn't question him any farther, for I knew it was pointless. Instead, I decided to send an owl to Malfoy. To apologize for not-attending his wedding.

* * *

"You know, I can't help you search if you don't tell me what we're looking for."

"I don't need you to help me search."

I sighed heavily and tried to pull my cloak tighter around me. It was cold, after all. "Why couldn't I stay in the hotel, then?"

"Because I like your company."

"Wow, Tom, are we paying compliments, now?"

"I'm in a good mood."

"Why?" I groaned. We were in the middle of an Albanian forest. Tom was looking - as it seemed to me - at each and every tree. Looking for holes or something.

"Because I'm close to find what I am looking for."

"Yeah? I hope so, I'm cold."

"Stop complaining."

"Well, I could be in England right now, nice and warm, and attend Malfoy's wedding..."

"And why? To have all these people call you a blood-traitor?"

I scoffed. "I am a pureblood, after all, and I act as if I was proud of that – they'll come around."

He stopped suddenly and turned around to look at me. "You should marry one of them, maybe. Earn yourself a good pureblood name."

I simply laughed at him. "Right. That sounds like me, doesn't it?"

He shrugged, stuck his arm into a hole in the next tree and his face lightened up in triumph. He pulled his arm out again and showed me what he had found.

"What's that?"

He turned a very old, but very precious looking crown in his hands. "It's Rowena Ravenclaw's diadem."

I stared at him. "Impossible!"

"Is it?"

"Generations of wizards have searched for this! You don't just walk into a forest and pull it out of a tree."

"Oh, well, Lord Voldemort does."

I rolled my eyes. "Would Lord Voldemort tell me how he knew that? If the idea didn't just pop up in his mind due to his unlimited wisdom?"

He growled at the sarcasm in my voice. "I asked the previous owner."

"Rowena's dead for..."

"Not Rowena. Her daughter, Helena. Otherwise known as the _Grey Lady_ of Ravenclaw House."

My eyes widened. I had lived with the Grey Lady for seven years and it had never occurred to me that she actually was Rowena Ravenclaw's daughter.

"Brilliant," I murmured.

He smirked. "Naturally."

"Would you mind telling me what you plan to do with it? You want to put it on..."

"I don't need to gain knowledge. I already possess that."

I rolled my eyes at how arrogant he was.

"It's a historical item with immense value – I want to turn it into a horcrux."

I stared at him, incredulous. He couldn't be serious. "So I was right. You really are going to murder me. Now I get it."

"Would you please stop it?"

"I wouldn't be that sarcastic if you hadn't tugged me out of bed at that unearthly hour."

He didn't respond but still looked at the diadem with a hint of joy in his eyes that I had _never_ seen in them. "No, I am not going to murder you. We're going to search for someone else to play that part."

* * *

"Look there, that's our man."

I swallowed hard. "Why do you need me here?"

"Because it's necessary that you learn a bit..."

"Learn a bit what?"

His eyes met mine. "A bit about dark arts."

"I'm not going to..."

"Shut it. I'll decide what you're going to do and what not."

I glared at him, but he didn't seem to care. With a small wave of his wand, the man dropped to the floor, bound.

"Why him?" I asked as we approached the man. "The last one was your father and now you're just killing some Albanian peasant?"

"Well, not everybody can be special, right?"

The man stared up at us, his eyes wide with fear. He babbled something which I didn't understand. I guessed he was begging, though.

"What do you intend to do?"

"_Muffliato_," murmured Tom with another wave of his wand. "I want you to torture him."

"Pardon?"

"I want you to use the Cruciatus-Curse."

I shook my head. "That's an Unforgivable."

"So?" Tom asked. He seemed slightly bored. "Just do it."

"No."

"Yes." He put his hands around my waist from behind. "Do it," he whispered in my ear.

I raised my wand hesitantly. "Please Tom, don't make me..."

"Do it."

I swallowed and whispered: _"Crucio_!"

The man sucked in a surprised breath, but nothing farther happened.

"No – come on, you can do better. Be convinced."

"Well, I'm not."

He groaned and pulled me even closer. "Try again."

"_Crucio!_" This time the man shook a little, but it was far from what one expected from the Cruciatus-Curse.

"Listen," muttered Tom, his mouth close to my ear. "You have to _want_ it. That's the thing about the dark arts. You need to want it."

"But I don't..."

"'Course you do. Try again."

I tried to calm down. He would kill him anyway. He would probably torture him anyway. If it was me or him – where was the difference? And if I did it right, it could all end right now. "_Crucio!"_ I said, as convinced as I could manage to.

The man screamed out loud and convulsed on the floor. I involuntarily pressed myself closer to Tom and lifted the curse at once.

"Well done," he whispered and kissed my cheek.

Tears shot in my eyes. "Let me go," I begged. "Please let me go."

He groaned, but let go of me. "Very well. I'll be at the hotel soon."

The last thing I saw before I disapparated was the cruel smirk with which Tom approached the doomed man.

* * *

I gasped as he appeared in our room. He was pale as death, red shimmering in his eyes.

"You look terrible."

"Why, thank you," he muttered. He didn't sound like himself at all. His voice was higher and tinier than before.

"You need to lie down. Come on, sweetheart..."

I tried to lead him to a couch, but he refused to move."We have to leave. We're flooing back to England as soon as..."

"As soon as you feel better," I said matter-of-factly. "You need to rest."

"But I cannot... they will..."

"No one will find out," I said softly. "Relax, Tom, lie down."

He gave in and sank on the couch. I sat down next to him. What if he went on with that? If he went through with his plan? I didn't want to imagine what he would look like then... what he would be like then.

"Go packing," he managed to whisper.

"Hardly. We have time, darling."

He shook his head frantically, but I didn't obey. Not this time.

"Relax, Tom. I want you to sleep a little..."

"No," he tried to sit up. "No, I can't... let me..."

I pushed him back on the couch. "I said relax and sleep. You really look horrible."

He sighed heavily, but closed his eyes. I started to softly strike his forearm and after a few minutes, I could feel his breath getting steadier. I guessed he had fallen asleep. I stood up, but he suddenly grabbed my wrists. I gasped and stared at him, his eyes suddenly open again.

"Stay," he whispered and I nodded.

* * *

**There we go...**


	13. Borgin&Burkes

**Hello, dear readers. Chapter 13's up now. Thanks to all those who read, fav'd, alerted and especially to Namine1993 for reviewing.**

**Don't have anything else to say, really. Here we go.**

* * *

"He's working at Borgin&Burkes?" Alphard shook his head in disbelief.

"He was one of the most brilliant students Hogwarts has ever seen and now he's working at _Borgin&Burkes_?"

I shrugged. "He gains some weird form of pleasure from it. I don't know... it's probably all these antique things – that's some obsession of his."

Alphard shook his head once again. He had found – although he already owned a reasonable amount of money – a position in the ministry. "The almighty Tom Riddle works as a shop-helper for Mr. Burke. That's something. I wonder why the _Prophet_ didn't make this his head story."

I laughed. "Probably because no one outside Hogwarts has ever heard from him."

It was a nice day, actually. Diagon Alley wasn't overfull like it used to be in August. In the middle of May, it was neither empty nor full. The sun shone bright and warm and we had used that to drink our tea out in the fresh air.

"You won't tell your family, will you? Tom would kill me."

"Of course not."

The best thing about having Alphard as a friend was that although he was born into "the most noble and ancient house of Black", he didn't share all their ideals. And thus, he wasn't one of Tom's little slaves. I had expected his hold on them to loosen once we were out of school, but the opposite seemed to be the case.

"I don't know why he does it. It can't honestly make him happy, it won't be enough for him," I continued our previous discussion, now that I had made sure he wouldn't spill. "So, he must be planning something."

"I would be dying to know what that is."

I scoffed. "I don't know. Sometimes I think I would just rather not know."

"It can't be so bad."

"We're talking about Tom. Of course it can be bad."

Alphard laughed. "Shouldn't you be the supporting and loving girlfriend?"

"I never quite fit in the role."

We fell silent for a little while.

"Did you hear it? My sister is going to marry Orion."

"Orion?" I frowned. "Aren't they... I mean. How close are they related?"

"We're second cousins to Orion and Lucretia."

"Second cousins? That's..." I hushed before I could say something that would offend him, but Alphard merely shrugged. "That's disgusting. I told my father somyself. He wouldn't listen."

"He was surely disappointed by you."

"He was. He said I wouldn't get it. That we had to preserve the purity of blood..."

"By marrying close relatives? That's... that is..."

"Disgusting, as I said it. Good thing Lucretia was already married off to the Prewetts. I wouldn't have obeyed if I had to..."

"That's a good thing. You all have to learn to stand up to your parents! I mean – what does your sister say?"

He scoffed. "That's the irony. She's beyond happy to serve the purity of our blood, our family. She's glad."

I shook my head. "Strange family you got."

"Yeah, sort of..."

* * *

"How's everything going?"

Tom shrugged and threw his cloak on the bed. "Well, everything goes as usually. People going in and out not wanting to be seen... they shouldn't be. I wonder why the Ministry never closed the shop. I'm going to see Mrs Smith tomorrow...she's always good for having something of value – see what I can get."

Tom was apparently very good at charming people into selling him their family heirlooms.

"Did you now Orion and Walburga are marrying?"

"Huh?" He was already in the bathroom. "Mhm-mhm," he muttered in consent.

"Did you approve?"

"Sure I did." He returned and eyed me suspiciously. "Something not right with that?"

"I, personally, find the thought of marrying my own cousin sickening, but obviously we don't exactly share opinion there."

"I hate to break it to you, but in old pureblood families marrying relatives is..."

"Oh, stop telling _me_ about old pureblood families."

He glared at me, obviously wanting to start one of his "I'm-the-heir-of-Slytherin-and-you're-just-a-blood-traitor"-talks. He didn't, though, maybe he got that I was not in the mood. Instead he just asked: "How do you know about it?"

"Alphard told me today. We were having tea..."

"You were having tea with Alphard Black?"

I raised an eyebrow challengingly at his jealousy popping up once again. "Yes? And?"

"I think I told you to stay away from him."

"And I think I told you that I'm not one of your slaves that you can order around."

His lips suddenly crashed on mine and I gasped. I hadn't seen that one coming. Of course, he had me giving in at once. I melted into his touch and he pulled me even closer.

"You're mine," he whispered as he finally pulled back. "Mine alone."

I sighed. "I never said anything contrary to that."

* * *

I had only once seen this expression on his face. Right before we went to look for Rowena Ravenclaw's diadem. This look of absolute craving for something. I knew it meant no good.

"Tom?" I asked carefully as to not anger him. "What is it?"

He didn't answer but he seemed beyond angry.

"What is it? Tell me."

"She indeed owns some very valuable stuff." There was this hint of red in his eyes and that never was a good sign. "The cup of Helga Hufflepuff. Mrs Smith is obviously her descendant..."

"Well, no wonder she likes you so well. As descendants of the owners..."

"Oh shut up!"

I gasped at his rudeness, but he didn't seem to care.

"She simply fancies me... it's disgusting. But guess what she's bought from Burke. Slytherin's locket."

"What?"

"A locket that belonged to Salazar Slytherin. She said that Burke had bought it years ago from a young, poor girl. For ten galleons."

I gasped again. "Your mother?" I guessed.

"I always knew that she must have been dumb, falling for that muggle. But selling Slytherin's locket – do you realize what it is worth? It's priceless – selling that for _ten galleons_! That proves it."

"Poor girl," I whispered. "She must have been desperate."

"Well. If she had sold that for a reasonable price, she wouldn't have been poor anymore. Could've survived."

My eyes narrowed dangerously. "I don't actually think that she wanted to survive."

"Not even for me, huh? Just say it. I'm not worth to be alive for..."

"Merlin, Tom, that's not what I wanted to say."

"WHAT DID YOU WANT TO SAY?"

I squared my shoulders. "Don't yell at me, Tom Riddle."

"It's Lord Voldemort, you know?"

I laughed bitterly. "I don't love _Voldemort_."

"See, my mother didn't, too."

"I'm fairly sure she loved you."

He grabbed my arm and I winced in pain. "I don't care if she loved me. She had no honour and she died. All I care about – is that locket."

* * *

I hurried through Diagon Alley, but didn't pay attention to any of it. Someone said my name, or better, shouted it, but I didn't turn to see who it was. I had greater problems. I looked around to check if anybody was watching me and then I entered the small lane that led to Knockturn Alley.

My steps felt much too loud. Borgin&Burkes was one of the first shops. As I entered, a bell rang strepitously. It only took Burke a second to appear.

He froze in place and eyed me suspiciously. "If you are from the Ministry, Ma'am, I can assure you that I sell nothing that..."

"I'm not from the Ministry," I interrupted him harshly. "I'm looking for Tom Riddle."

"Tom Riddle."

"I know he works here... he went out yesterday, claiming to have to visit a client – but he never came back."

"He resigned from the job a few days ago. He didn't visit any clients for me yesterday."

I stared at him. "He – he resigned from the job? Why?"

"Didn't name any reasons. If you don't want to buy or sell anything, Ma'am, I suggest you better leave."

I sighed heavily. "Very well." I turned to leave, but stopped when I was at the door. "And you're absolutely sure?"

"Absolutely, Ma'am, there is no doubt."

The door fell shut behind me and I hurried back to leave this horrid place behind me. When I finally reached Diagon Alley, I leant against a wall and only then realized that I had started to cry. When he didn't return home last night I had suspected that something was wrong. He was usually so very reliable.

"Lorraine? Lorraine? Hey, what's up with you?"

I brushed my tears away and looked up to find Alphard standing before me, a worried look on his face.

"What are you doing here? Don't you have to work?"

"Don't you have to work, too?"

I shook my head. "Free day."

"You're crying. What happened?"

"He... he's gone, you see, he's gone...Tom."

His eyes went wide. "What do you mean he's gone?"

"He just disappeared. Obviously, he quit his job and left...He's nowhere to be found."

"He'll come back, I'm sure."

I tried to pull myself together, but I didn't fully succeed. Obviously, Tom hadn't wanted to tell me where he was going and he didn't want me to find him. And if Tom didn't want to be found, I wouldn't find him.

"Why are you here?"

"I'm here to speak to Mr. Burke. We know he currently was in negotiations with Mrs Hephzibah Smith."

I stiffened as he mentioned the name.

"She was found murdered this morning."

I stared at him in horror. This couldn't be a coincidence. "Was anything missing? I mean – was she robbed?"

He shrugged. "Maybe. We don't know for sure yet."

"You'll keep me up-to-date, won't you?"

He shrugged. "It's not a very important thing. An everyday-murder, if you ask me."

"Still."

"Alright, fine, I'll tell you if there is any news. Want to sell it to the _Prophet_, don't you?

I didn't bother to answer that. Of course the poor lady had been robbed and they would figure that out soon enough. Tom had murdered her. Killed her and took both the locket and the cup. And then he fled. That moment, I simply knew it. It fit in the picture so well.

* * *

**Maybe you'll be so kind as to leave a review. It would make my day :)**


	14. 6 years later

**Here we are with Chapter 14. For all those curious - yes, he did leave her. Yes, it was for long. And no, I won't focus on these years since it's boring without him ;)**

**Thanks to all those who read, fav'd, alerted and especially to those who reviewed. I know I say that everytime, but I really mean it.**

* * *

"How are you doing these days?"

"Are you still going to marry this Black boy?"

"Yes, mother, I'll marry Alphard."

"Then I'm not fine."

I sighed heavily. "Please, mother."

"I couldn't be more proud." My grandmother sat down next to my mother. "Tea, darling?"

My mother shook her head. "I couldn't be more ashamed."

"She's marrying a Black. I never thought she would do quite so well."

I had enough. "I'm not a marrying a Black. I'm not marrying a good name and I'm certainly not marrying pure blood. I'm marrying Alphard because I honestly like him."

"Do you love him?" my mother asked.

I didn't know what to say. Did I love him? Probably not. But Alphard was one of the good ones and I liked him very much. It was a compromise – I knew it and Alphard probably knew it, too.

"Why, mother, what does it matter to you?"

"You can't force her to be something that she's not, Lucida," my grandmother said warningly.

"Well, you can't either!" My mother jumped up and left.

"Wow, she needs to calm down."

"She can't. She hasn't calmed down ever since Dad is dead."

My grandmother scoffed. "I haven't mourned your grandfather so much..."

"Well, gramps was already old and ill. You had your time..." Truth was, she probably had never loved my grandfather. Arranged marriage, like it always was...

"It's almost two years. She should move on."

"It's not that easy, nana."

"And when, when will the wedding be? It's time, you see... you're engaged for..."

"Almost two years, I know. It's just - we're both having so incredible much work to do."

"You are 25, it's time that you..."

"You excuse me? I have to go." She stared at me in disbelief, but I simply got up and grabbed my coat. "I'll see you soon."

* * *

"How's your mother?"

"Horrid, as always. She never recovered from my father's death."

Alphard sighed heavily. "She still hates me, huh?"

"Funny enough, she just hates that you're a pureblood. In her eyes, I couldn't have done worse. My grandmother adores you, though."

He laughed bitterly. "I'm sorry for getting you in trouble."

"Oh, no. No, no." I gently touched his cheek. "This is not at all your fault – I am sorry that I even told you."

"Strange family you got," he muttered and I laughed.

"Yeah, sort of."

He kissed me softly. "See, I have to go... lots of work. Minister Diggory has ordered a meeting."

"He's a numptie."

"Now, come on, Lorrie, don't."

"I'm just saying..."

He chuckled and kissed me once again.

"Will I see you tonight?"

"Oh – sorry. No, I'll probably be working till I fall asleep at my table."

I sighed. "Alright... pity. See you tomorrow, then."

* * *

"Yes, of course, Mr Cuffe, it'll be the first thing I'll do on Monday..."

"Monday, Monday, whenever I hear things like that – I want it for the Sunday issue."

"It's impossible, Sir, I'll never mange to finish it in due time."

He growled. "You're always later than I expect you to..."

"I always have better quality than you expect me to, Sir."

He groaned again, but obviously, this had him convinced. "You're right," he muttered.

"I promise you that the _Prophet_ will have an excellent article on this. Tuesday. I'm doing that after the weekend..."

"Alright, Riley, head on home."

"Thank you, Sir." I jumped up. I was already quite late and I couldn't wait to go home.

I apparated right outside the building and landed safely in front of the house which contained my flat. It was surprisingly quiet all around. There was no sign of lights or any sign of life at all in the whole building. I shrugged the bad feeling off as I climbed the stairs.

I stopped in front of my door. "_Alohomora_!" I whispered, half chuckling at the thought of what my mother would say if she knew that I didn't use a key for my door. I reached for the light switch, but the light didn't turn on. I tried it once again. Nothing happened. Maybe there was a power outage? I glanced out the window and saw that the street lamps were lit.

"Weird," I muttered to myself. I would just go check the fuse. "_Lumos_!" My wand produced a wonderful little light and I felt better in no time.

That was, until I was certain to hear footsteps in the living room. I held back my gasp and instead muttered: "_Nox_!" Everything went dark again.

I entered the living room, my wand raised, ready to defend myself against anyone. Suddenly, someone grabbed me from behind. I screamed, but a hand had moved over my mouth to muffle me.

"Relax, it's me, you're fine, it's me."

I stiffened, but didn't try to free myself anymore. Even though his voice was higher than I remembered, I recognized it at once. He let go of me.

I turned around to face him. "You're back."

He passed me, not even bothering to answer. Tom looked horrible – his eyes were nearly red, he was even paler than I had last seen him and his once handsome features seemed – washed out, less clear. Much less beautiful.

"I've come to inquire about the ring I gave you."

I stared at him. "Six years? Six years and the only thing you're interested in is the bloody ring?"

"Where is it?"

"I don't have it anymore!"

His eyes grew wide with fear. "What have you done with it?"

I didn't answer him and he pushed me roughly against the wall.

"Where is it?"

"Let go of me!"

"Tell me where it is!"

"Let go of me _now._"

He crashed me hard against the wall. Tears shot in my eyes, but I refused to give in. "Tell me," he growled.

"Let go of me. My fiancé will be home soon," I threatened and suddenly he backed off. "Your fiancé?"

"Yes, fiancé, shall I spell it for you?"

"How – since – who?"

"None of your business."

"Oh, well, I suppose I'll just have to stay and I'll find out."

"No!" I gasped. "You will leave him alone!"

"Yeah? What's so special about him?"

I stared at him, afraid by now. "What do you mean?"

"What's so special about him that you actually want to marry him? You never wanted to marry me."

"Well, for instance, he cares about me. I like that."

"So – basically you're with him because _he_ likes _you_. That's all?"

"Relationships have been based on less."

"Where is the ring?"

"Don't worry, I hid it in a safe place. You didn't honestly think that I would just throw it away, did you?"

He waved his wand and suddenly the lights went on.

"You tried to be scary, huh?"

"Where?"

"Remember the old shack your uncle lived in? Little Hangleton? I hid it there."

"Why?" he growled.

"I wanted to be rid of it and this was the only place I could think of."

"You're sure that it's safe?"

"100 percent. Do you want a tea? Or coffee?"

"Whiskey? I need to drink on the shock."

I didn't feel comfortable turning my back on him, but I did it anyway. He would probably only get angrier if he understood that I mistrusted him. I filled two glasses with whiskey.

"There you go."

He took a nip without moving his eyes from my face. "Is it true? You have a fiancé."

"Yes."

"Will he really stop by?"

"Probably not," I admitted. "It's already quite late."

"Yes it is."

He sat down on the sofa, finally freeing me from his intense stare. "Who?"

"Alphard Black."

His eyes shot up. "I should've known it," he whispered. "You were always quite close."

I shrugged and took a rather large sip.

"How long?"

"Oh... uhm – we're together for like 3 years? Engaged for 2."

"And when..."

"We haven't set the date."

He didn't say anything, just stared into his drink with an unreadable expression.

"Why did you leave?"

He sighed. "It was complicated..."

"Don't you dare! I know you murdered Hephzibah Smith, and you stole the locket and the cup from her! You turned them into horcruxes, didn't you?"

His gaze was murderous. "I don't think that you can prove that."

"No. Because you blamed it on the poor house-elf."

"I don't think that you can prove that," he repeated.

"Only question is – why didn't you tell me? Why did you leave me?"

"Would you have stayed? I planned another murder – two, actually – just for _possession_. And you're oh-so-moral. You would've never approved."

"You never cared before."

"I needed these years alone. To become Lord Voldemort."

I scoffed. "That was probably the poorest apology that I've ever heard."

"Maybe that's because I didn't mean to apologise."

"You know what, Tom? You should leave. It's late."

He got up and moved towards me, only stopping when he was right in front of me. He was so close – if I would just lean in a little...

"Would you tell your fiancé to leave, too?"

I swallowed hard. "That's hardly the same."

"He shouldn't stay overnight, you see. Play the good pureblood and be a virgin on your wedding night."

I laughed bitterly. "We both know it's a little late for that."

"Oh, I know and you know – but can dear Alphard tell the difference?"

I scoffed. "I'm fairly sure he can."

"Then you certainly won't mind..." And suddenly his arms were wrapped around my waist and his lips were on mine. I didn't know how it happened but out of nowhere, he had me backed against the wall, his tongue exploring my mouth. Eventually, we had to break apart for oxygen.

"Don't," I whispered and freed myself from his touch. Curiously enough, he didn't object. He just looked... hurt. "Please don't."


	15. The Dark Lord

**You wanna know what the horrid thing about doing a gap year is? You have to attend seminars. I'm just back - and it was horrible. Really. Like... I'm SO glad I only have to do another week of it in February and can be done with it. Honestly I'm - I don't have words for it. **

**Anyway. I survived and am now updating. We left off with Tom being back after 6 years and also, with Tom being an egoistic ***, as one of my reviewers so eloquently put it. I'll stop rambling now.**

**Thanks to all those who read, fav'd, alerted and especially to those who reviewed.**

* * *

I had never seen Alphard angry. That was a first. "When did you want to tell me that he's back?"

"Sorry, what?"

"Huh, when did you want to tell me that Riddle is back?"

I looked at him calmly. "I wasn't going to tell you at all, because it is of no importance."

He shook his head in fury. "No importance, aha, that's why you snogged him, am I right?"

I went pale at once. "Oh, no, he didn't!" I jumped up and started walking up and down in the room.

"So he told the truth."

I stopped to eye him. "Did you doubt that?"

"I hoped that he was lying."

"He...he came here and... I don't even know how it happened."

"Honestly, that doesn't make it any better." He turned to leave, but I grabbed his arm.

"Al, please – I...I'm sorry... I mean – I don't –"

"And what now, huh? You know him! He's gonna want you back – and you will give in, you always did."

"Don't, come on – I don't want him back, I... I want to be with you. We are going to..."

"No. That's just the point; we are not going to do anything, because he's back. You waited for that – don't deny it."

He wanted to leave again, but I stood in front of him and put my hands on his chest. "Please, don't, Al, I didn't, I still want..."

"Do you love me?"

I searched for answer to neither tell him yes nor no, but he understood way too quickly.

"See, I always knew that – and I didn't care. But now that he's back... you love him, you see? Don't try to deny it. And this is why I won't be enough anymore. I can love you all I want. I'm just not enough."

"Al," I muttered, unable to say anything further. He was right in a way – I had never loved him that way. But I still...

"Don't try. It will only make it worse."

"Al, please..."

But he was gone and left me standing there, sobbing uncontrollably.

* * *

"Tea, darling?"

I eyed Druella suspiciously. Mrs Black usually didn't invite me over for a tea – she had to have something in mind. With my luck, it certainly had something to do with Alphard's and mine recent breakup.

"That would be too kind."

She smiled, and handed me a cup. "There you go."

I nipped. "So... how is your lovely daughter?"

Bellatrix was by now around a year old and I had only once seen her when she was officially presented to society.

"She's very well... healthy. A pretty baby, actually."

I eyed Druella. If I was right, she was pregnant again. Probably hoping for a son this time.

"If I may ask...," I muttered. I would regret this. "What about Alphard? How does he cope?"

"Rather bad. I'm afraid you broke his heart."

Any sign of gentleness had left her eyes and she stared at me, probably repeating _blood-traitor, blood-traitor, blood-traitor_ in her head.

"He broke up with me, not the other way round."

"But you... I mean. I can understand that it's not easy to refuse the Dark Lord – not clever, even..."

"The Dark Lord?" I asked in disbelief. He couldn't be serious. No, he just couldn't be serious. He didn't make people call him _the Dark Lord_ now!

"The Dark Lord, yes, whatever is wrong with you?"

I gave a bitter laugh. "And that is who I lost my fiancé for." I took another sip and shook my head. "The Dark Lord, he must have gone mad..."

"Lorraine! Talking like that about him..."

I put the cup down and stood up. "Would you mind – telling Alphard that I... that I miss him. And if he ever feels like talking to me – he shall come."

Druella stood, too, quickly and then whispered: "You should never speak about our lord like that again."

"Our lord?" I breathed. "Your lord maybe – I will speak about Tom however I like to."

She stared at me with a terrified expression, but I didn't bother. I would surely not give in so easily.

* * *

I shrieked as I found him sitting in an arm-chair in _my_ living-room, but I regained my composure rather quickly. "Tom, dearie, what are you doing here?"

He smirked coldly. "I was visiting dear Cygnus Black today and his wife told me a most interesting thing."

I stiffened. So Druella actually felt the need to tell "her lord" about what I was saying. "I didn't realize you were spying on me."

"I don't need to spy on you."

"Yeah? Why would talk to Druella about me then?"

"She only told me about your recent disobediences."

"Disobediences? I wasn't aware that I actually had to obey the _Dark Lord_."

He managed to smile, though I could see his fury. "See, the Blacks are really supportive. Good followers. But it's only right that they look up to me and that they honour me by..."

"By calling you the Dark Lord? I thought you suffered from hubris when you called yourself Lord Voldemort, but that really topped it."

He stood up and walked towards me. I remembered the last time he had been so close, but this time he really scared me. "You will never talk about me like that to my... friends again. Did you understand me?"

I didn't answer but glared at him angrily. Suddenly, he shoved me against the nearest wall, hand on my throat. "Did you understand me?"

"Perfectly well, yes."

He let go of me and I rubbed my throat. "That was absolutely unnecessary."

He sat down and I noticed that he was weighing his wand in his left hand.

"I heard about your breakup with poor Alphard. Such a pity."

"Don't try to fool me. I know you told him that..."

"That what?" His intense eyes met mine and I shivered involuntarily.

"That you kissed me."

"Oh, but you kissed me back."

I sat down on the couch across from him. "Still you told him..."

He shrugged. "I can't help being a little possessive."

"A little?" I repeated. "Hate to break it to you, but you're more than just a little possessive."

He smirked once again. "What do you think? How long will you be angry at me – I mean it's like – I did worse."

"Enough is enough. See, I needed years to get over the fact that you just left me, I surely won't fall back in your arms just because you ask me to!"

He sighed heavily. "You know me – I always get what I want."

"Why don't you find yourself another girl and let me be? I'm sure it wouldn't be a trouble – they all used to fancy you."

"Right, but see, you already belonged to me once and I don't like to lose anything."

"You lost me 6 years ago."

He merely smirked. "We'll see, I guess."

"Yes, we'll see."

"I checked on the ring."

I rolled my eyes. You should think that he could trust me. "So?"

"Well hidden, I must say and not too bad protected. I improved the protection a little..."

"By doing what? The thing is now probably killing anyone who touches it?"

"Pretty much."

I stared at him. I hadn't actually thought that I was right.

"You should leave," I whispered weakly. "I'm tired."

"You're scared."

"Terrified."

He laughed shortly, a very cold, high tone and got up. "Maybe that teaches you to be a little more respectful."

"You wish," I muttered under my breath. Whether he didn't hear it or simply didn't care, I didn't know.

He kissed me on the cheek as he passed me and as I turned around to watch him, he was already gone.

* * *

**I apologize for the relative shortness of this chapter and hope you enjoyed it nevertheless :) Review?**


	16. Ghosts of the Past

**I want to thank everybody for the great response to the last chapter, I received 5 reviews, which is the most I ever had in a week for one chapter. THANKS EVERYBODY! :) It's greatly appreciated.**

* * *

I hadn't seen Tom for a couple of months. I heard about him, though. Wherever I went, whoever I spoke to, they told me about _Lord Voldemort_ and his ambitions. How they liked him! How they respected him! Surely, he would be Minister of Magic in less than five years. I knew Tom well enough to know that he didn't want to be Minister. A mere position wasn't enough for him.

I didn't have the time to worry about it, though.

My grandmother died in summer 1953. She stated in her will that, as I was the only one of her descendent who had "the decent wizarding pride", I would inherit pretty much all her fortune. I didn't exactly mind, of course, but my mother refused to talk to me for weeks after that. I knew she was only sad – she had lived with my grandmother for the past few years, after all and – Merlin, she was her mother, she_ should_ be sad. Still, I was pretty angry at her. It wasn't my fault after all!

* * *

I looked in the mirror and flattened my robes. I could go out like this. Druella and Cygnus Black were celebrating the birth of her second daughter, Andromeda. Actually, I was surprised to be invited – since my breakup with Alphard, I had been excluded from Black family events. I was going anyway, of course.

The Black family home was decorated and full of noises. I was pushing through the crowd, searching for the hosts. The sooner I greeted them, the sooner I could leave again.

"Lorraine? Oh, hey, Lorraine!"

I looked around and found Abraxas Malfoy waving at me from across the room. I raised my hand to return the gesture and he moved towards me, accidently knocking a small witch of her feet. "Oh, Mellonia, so sorry..."

The witch grumbled something and refused to let him help her up. He shrugged and then finally caught up to me. "Lorraine, what a nice surprise. I didn't know you were invited..."

"Actually, I'm quite surprised myself..."

He nodded understandingly and then sighed. "If you are searching for the hosts – you can't find them right now."

"Sorry, what?"

"Yeah, it seems as if Druella had another crying fit –"

"Another?" I repeated.

Malfoy nodded and looked around. Nobody actually paid attention to our conversation, so he was going on. "She so hoped for a son, you see, to carry on the family name... since Walburga and Orion don't have any children and Alphard..." He fell silent and looked at me apologetically.

"Oh, don't concern yourself. So she has another girl and gets that hysterical about it?"

"Obviously."

"That's just stupid."

Malfoy shrugged. "Actually – if I was in the same position..."

I raised my eyebrows and he sighed. "You have to carry on the line!"

"Yeah, well – I don't see why Alphard shouldn't marry and get children – he's a nice fellow, isn't he? And what about Walburga and Orion? They are still young..."

"Sure, I just – I suppose they don't get along that well."

"Well, _that_ doesn't surprise me."

"Ah, Lorraine, there you are!"

I spun around and saw Tom suddenly standing next to me. He smiled shortly at me, a smile that didn't reach his eyes and then he looked at Abraxas, who obeyed at once.

"Milord," he muttered and then turned around to leave.

"I was just having a conversation," I said irritably.

"Yes, and I interrupted it."

"Noticed that."

"Don't you want to thank me?"

"For what?" I asked, perplexed.

"For making them invite you."

"So that was you. I thought there was something wrong with that."

He smiled smugly. "Actually, I wanted to see you, so..."

"When exactly did you decide that you'll stop just appearing in my flat?"

"Would you prefer that?"

"No, it was creepy."

He grinned and shrugged. "Where is the lovely Druella tonight? I thought this was _her_ festivity..."

"She's crying out her eyes upstairs. Absolute hysteria, obviously, because she didn't get a son."

"Ah, I see..."

"Don't tell me you understand that."

He smiled, mildly amused. "Actually, no, I don't understand. But I don't need an heir, so..."

I shook my head in disbelief. "No, you don't, seeing as your immortal and all..."

He groaned quietly, obviously not pleased with the topic. "On to more mannered subjects – you look lovely tonight. Though I have to say, black is not your colour. Since when-"

"My grandmother died just recently."

"Oh," he stared at me. "I'm sorry."

I shrugged. "She was old, so... didn't exactly come unexpected, I guess."

"Only your mother left, then?"

"And my siblings."

"You see them often?"

"No. Never."

He fell silent, obviously didn't know what to say anymore. I sighed. "I hope she's recovering soon. I can't go if Druella hasn't seen me..."

"I'll tell her you where here."

I flashed him a small smile. "No, thank you – but if you'd excuse me, I see Lucretia over there... have to greet her..."

"Lorraine?"

I froze in my path and turned around once more. "Yeah?"

"See you soon?"

"If you keep on making people invite me..."

He shrugged and I picked up my path again to join Lucretia and her husband.

* * *

"There you go – it's just a small article, we just need to mention it quickly. A little humour, you see – for tomorrow."  
I nodded and Mr Cuffe handed me the slip of parchment on which he had scribbled the information. I read over it and froze.

_Ghost of young girl (Miriam – Myrta, something like that) bashed_ _wedding of haunted girl's brother (Hornby). Ghost has to go back to place of death (Hogwarts)_.

"Mr Cuffe – is that – is that all accurate? I mean – is it true?"

"Why, yes, of course it's true."

I swallowed hard. "I would've never thought..."

"What?"

"Nothing, Sir. Very – humours."

He stared at me curiously and then left. I leant back in my chair and stared at the parchment. So Myrtle hadn't ever stopped haunting Olive – and Olive had been so happy to be finally rid of her when we had left Hogwarts! And now that – Myrtle even ruining her brother's wedding!

At least she now was going to be rid of her. Going back to the place of her death. I knew it exactly. The bathroom on the second floor, I would never forget the day they found her.

"Good story, isn't it?"

I jumped and looked up to see Tom sitting on a chair in front of my desk.

"If I had known what a nuisance that girl would be as a ghost..."

"What then?" I whispered. "Don't tell me you wouldn't have..."

"Wouldn't have what?" he asked threateningly. "I'll give you an advice – you won't mention the circumstances of dear Myrtle's death in the slightest."

"I wasn't going to," I answered calmly. It was the truth, after all. I wouldn't have mentioned that. Still, he was obviously concerned that I could spill.

"I don't know why you're checking up on me."

"I have to make sure, don't I? I can't rely on others."

"You have trust issues."

"I was betrayed too often."

"Maybe _you_ just betrayed too often."

A smile formed on his face and he seemed genuinely amused. "I missed this."

"Missed what?"

"You fighting me all the time. I missed it. I don't have so many people that are actually retorting."

"That's because they're scared of you."

"They'd better be. But they can't tell when to be scared and when not. They don't know me well enough... that's only you."

I raised an eyebrow. "Careful, Tom. I might actually think there is a bit of affection in you."

He shrugged, still smiling. "Maybe there is."

I laughed shortly. "Don't try to fool me. As you said, I know you well enough."

He suddenly seemed very serious. "I'm not fooling you. I never tried to give you another impression, Lorraine. I want you back."

"And I told you that you can't have me back!"

He leaned forward, a hint of red glowing in his eyes. "Sure you did. I only don't believe you really mean it."

"Stop it, please," I whispered. "You should..."

"Right, I should leave. How many times are you going to dismiss me like that?"

"As many times as you keep coming back."

He smirked. "Well, I'll never stop coming back." Tom got up and moved around the chair and the desk until he was standing right in front of me. "Why don't you just give in?"

"Because it's wrong."

He shook his head and then bent down slowly, his lips now only millimetres away from mine. "Is it?" he whispered.

He closed the small gap between us and pressed his lips against mine. My eyes fell shut and I responded to his kiss almost immediately. It was crazy, insane, madness that I was still yielding to his every touch, that he had me there so easily... the feeling was incredible. His lips were softly moving on mine, his hand had somehow found her way into my hair...

He pulled back slightly. I turned my head so that I didn't have to see the smug expression on his face, but he gently grabbed my chin with two fingers and turned my head around so that I had to look at him. He didn't look smug at all.

"Did that feel wrong? Please tell me, 'cause to me, it didn't."

I bit my lip and then whispered: "I never said it _feels_ wrong."

"Then just give in."

He must have felt the submission in me, because he bent down to attach our lips once again.

* * *

**So, there you are. Happy that they're back together? 'Cause I certainly am ;)**


	17. The Dark Mark

**Thank you again for the amazing response to the last chapter (6 reviews, that's officially the most reviews I ever got). Also thanks to everyone who read, fav'd and alerted.**

**We left off with Tom and Lorraine being back together, which is awesome, at least for me :) On we go.**

* * *

I soon learned that time was passing faster when you were with Tom. He was always busy – travelling, visiting people and explaining his ideas. Sometimes, he took off alone or with his followers. I never asked what he was up to, afraid of the answer. He succeeded in keeping his ambitions and the cruelty of his and his follower's hidden from public.

The years flew by. Druella and Cygnus Black had received another daughter – Narcissa – and after several crying attacks, Mrs Black had regained her composure and was since then urging Alphard to finally settle. I had only spoken to Alphard on very few occasions. After these conversations, I believed that Druella was fighting a losing battle.

There were people more fortunate, though. Abraxas had very proudly declared that his wife was pregnant and was even more proud when she gave birth to a very healthy son – Lucius. He was by now four years old and resembled his father very much.

Tom, on the other hand, never wanted to make it "official". As he so charmingly declared, he didn't need an heir anyway, so why bother marrying?

I didn't object. Personally, I wasn't the family type.

* * *

We were celebrating the tenth wedding day of Walburga and Orion Black. I had sat down next to Tom and he had his arm around my shoulders, probably just showing off that we were together as Alphard was of course somewhere around.

"So, milord, how did your talks with the werewolves go?"

"Not so well. I can't let them join my ranks as the usual wizards, you see? Honestly. They are werewolves! So... yeah. They are not happy with that."

"Why do you even want the werewolves to join your cause, milord?"

Tom shot Nott, who had dared to question him, a deathly glance. "Because, Nott, Lord Voldemort needs all the forces that he can gain."

"Yes, milord," Nott whispered.

I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. I didn't want to know all this, I didn't want to know that Tom tried to gain "forces" and I didn't want to know what for...

"Something wrong?" he whispered in my ear.

"I don't feel so well. I should get some fresh air."

"Do that," he pulled back his arm and I got up, smiling slightly at the men surrounding him.

As soon as I had left the room, I leant against the wall and took a deep breath. Now he was completely mental.

"Galloping Gargoyles! Lorraine. You scared me!"

I looked up and saw Walburga Black staring at me. She obviously had just entered through a door behind which – as I believed – was a bathroom.

"Walburga – you not in the saloon?"

"No, I – uhm – actually... I didn't feel so well."

I raised an eyebrow and eyed her, a little suspicious. Just like in my case not feeling so well was probably just an excuse for something else.

"Well, er, sorry about that."

"No, no, in fact... nothing to be sorry about."

Her hand casually caressed her belly and I got it.

"You're – you're expecting a child, aren't you?"

She stared at me in shock, and then smiled shyly as she nodded.

"Why, congratulations – that's splendid! I'm sure you're very happy?"

"Yes. Yes, indeed."

I smiled. "When are you going to make it public?"

"Not quite yet – in a few weeks time... before it's obvious that everybody knows anyway."

I nodded and she lingered there a moment, unsure of what to do next, then she murmured something and disappeared into the saloon.

* * *

"You missed out on all the dinner."

"I was tired."

"You could have said goodbye."

"To whom?"

He groaned and dropped in an armchair across from the one I was sitting in. "You're impossible."

"I try."

He sat up a little straighter. "I have to ask a favour of you."

My eyes narrowed suspiciously. Whenever Tom requested a favour, it wasn't something good. Most of the time it was something that I regretted at once.

"What is it?"

"I need... I need an improved form of communication."

I frowned. "I don't get your drift, sorry."

"Ah, see, I thought – wouldn't it be incredibly practical if my followers and I were connected, through some form of magic... which allows me to summon them and allows them, if they want to, to tell me their location and their... well, their emotional condition?"

"That would be very... convenient, yes."

He nodded, and leant a little forward, obviously encouraged by my words. "See, that's what I thought. And I also already thought of a method... but... I didn't have the chance to practice it. I would like to make absolutely – I'm fairly sure, you see, but – absolutely sure that it works. I have to test it."

"So you want to test it on me."

He nodded once again, eyeing me cautiously. "That's what I thought, yes."

"What is your method, exactly?"

"Right! I thought of a mark – something like... like yeah, a magical tattoo on the arm. It would connect you to me..."

I frowned. "I don't know if that is-"

"Well, the worst that could happen is that it doesn't work. Honestly, there's nothing..."

"But I would run around with that... mark for like – always?"

"Forever, yes."

I softly ran my hand over my forearm. "I'm not sure..."

"Please! Please, I beg you! I _have_ to test it!"

"It'll hurt, won't it?"

He hesitated and then sighed. "Well, it's a form of dark magic – so yes. It'll probably hurt. But, you know, I can take that away, I can..."

"Alright," I whispered.

His eyes widened. "Really?"

I nodded. Who was I to deny him a favour if he was literally begging me? A smile widened on his face, he jumped to his feet and pulled out his wand. With a few steps he was next to me. "Give me your left arm."

I sighed and tucked the sleeve up, shivering slightly. "There you go."

"Alright... you sure? I'm counting to three. One...Two...Three. _Morsmordre_."

Pain flashed through my arm and from there through my whole body and I gave small cry, muffling it as good as I could. For a few seconds, I couldn't think from the pain pulsating in my arm. Then, very, very slowly, it ebbed away.

I was very glad to be sitting, even now I could feel my knees shivering.

I straightened up a bit and stared at my forearm. A black symbol had burnt itself in the flesh. It was a skull and a snake winding itself out of the skull's mouth.

Tom watched me carefully. "Are you okay?"

I nodded weakly and whispered: "So? Is it working?"

He smiled. "Let's try. If you'd touch it with your wand..."

I got up and took my wand from the kitchen table where I had left it. "Just touching?"

"Just touching."

I lightly touched the mark with the tip of my wand and watched Tom's eyes widening triumphantly.

"I can feel you there," he whispered.

I grinned, the feeling of triumph filling me as well. I lifted the wand and nodded. "It works."

"Yeah, it works."

With tow long strides, he was standing in front of me. He placed his hands on my cheeks and leant forward to capture my lips. Before I even knew it, I had my arms around his neck, my legs around his waist and he was carrying me to the bedroom.

* * *

I froze at the pain shooting through my arm. What the- I looked around to see if anybody was watching me, but all the people in Diagon Alley were much too busy with their Christmas shopping to pay attention to me. I tucked my sleeve up and saw Tom's mark in jet black, it seemed much clearer than it usually did.

What happened? Why was it burning, was it...? Then I got it. _Which allows me to summon them._ He was calling for me – or maybe not only me. Or not me at all. He had given the mark to some of his followers already, now that he had made sure that it worked. I decided that I had to check either way.

I looked around once again and then apparated. For a short moment, I felt pressed together, I couldn't breathe – and then I opened my eyes again and saw that I was indeed in Malfoy Manor.

Tom had leant back into an armchair, he looked as if he was waiting for something. Abraxas Malfoy next to him seemed rather pale. Tom got up and smiled. "So it worked! I wonder... where are the others?"

"Took me some time to figure out what you wanted, and I know you pretty well. I wouldn't be surprised if they don't get it..."

There was a loud pop and Nott appeared next to me. "Milord? I assume you summoned me..."

"Yes, indeed."

"May I ask what the purpose of this was, Tom?"

He spun around and glared at me. I involuntarily took a step back, shocked. "You'll refer to me as _milord_, got it?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Why should I?"

"_Crucio!_"

Every nerve in my body was – pain. There was nothing but pain, I screamed. I wanted it to end, it should end...

Suddenly the pain was gone and I found myself lying on the floor. I sat up, a strange numb feeling all over my body and I glared at Tom.

"Because I say so," he said quietly.

I got up to my feet and flattened my robes. "I don't think that you need me here... milord."

Before he could say anything else, I turned on the spot and vanished.

* * *

**Take a few seconds and tell me what you think. 7 this time? 7 is a very powerful magical number, you see?**


	18. Death Eaters

**I'm SO happy about the response to the last chapter, 10 reviews, I don't even know what to say :) compared to some other stories, that may seem a bit pathetic ;) but for me, that's just great! I love you guys. Thanks to everyone who read, fav'd and alerted... and especially to the ten amazing people who reviewed.**

**Also, the next few chapters of CoS were published on Pottermore this week, which was amazing! I loved every second of it, especially the new exclusive content by J.K. on pureblood families ;)**

**Yeah, we left off with Tom using the Cruciatus Curse on Lorraine, which is a new low-point, I guess.**

* * *

"I need you to forgive me."

"Yeah, I figured that."

I continued my way through the hallway of the Daily Prophet's offices and Tom followed my every step.

"I'll have to keep the respect of my followers."

"That absolutely sounds reasonable. We're good," I said sarcastically.

"Now, come on, Lorraine, I'm serious!"

"Okay, then let me put this straight: I'm angry. Out of my mind, even. This is probably the maddest I've ever been! You _tortured_ me, what's even going on in your head? And for what, I may ask, for what? That's just...ugh! I can't even put it in words!"

"If you expect me to say that I'm sorry..."

"No, I don't. You're not capable of remorse."

"Please, Lorraine..." He grabbed my arm and forced me to stop.

"What?"

"Please. I love you."

I laughed bitterly. "Now you're insulting my intellect. I'd never hold it against you, but please don't lie. You don't love anything or anyone."

He smirked. "I do love something."

"Oh? And what would that be?"

"Hogwarts."

I stared at him, trying to figure out if he was serious or just mocking me. "Hogwarts."

"That's what I just said."

I frowned. "What are you on about?"

"Ah, good – see, I'm going to apply again. For the DADA post."

"Why?"

He raised an eyebrow. "I want to go back to Hogwarts."

"No, no, that's not it. Why do you want to go back to Hogwarts?"

He smirked slightly. "Didn't you listen? I want the post-"

"Yeah! But why! Don't tell me you're so fond of teaching."

"But I am." He leant against the wall, his arms folded across his chest. "I am even good at it – I've been teaching _you_ all my life and how successful..." He lowered his voice and added, "Remember how I taught you the Cruciatus-curse in barely five minutes-"

I groaned. "Don't remind me! And you're not fond of teaching at all. You get impatient at once and snap. Now, seriously, why do you want to go back?"

He sighed. "Don't you see the appeal of Hogwarts? A giant castle full of mysteries... things to be found... hidden places-"

"You want to find something?"

His eyes glittered as he smiled at me. "Oh, no, not at first – later on, maybe – but first of all, I want to hide something."

"A Horc-"

"SILENCE!"

I flinched at his sudden outburst. "All right, all right – but I tell you, Dumbledore's never going to give you the post."

"Oh, yeah? We'll see... you wouldn't mind accompanying me? Only a few of my followers will come along – I'd like your company..."

I raised my eyebrows. "Wait, have you forgotten that I'm angry at you?"

"No. I still want you to accompany me, though."

I sighed in exasperation. "All right, then. When do we depart?"

* * *

"I think it's safe for us to stay here-"

"Why shouldn't it be?"

Tom's short look at me told me to shut up and I obeyed at once – I remembered well what had happened the last time.

Antonin Dolohov, a dark-haired and burly man, looked around in the Hogshead's taproom. "Cosy," he muttered.

"You will wait here," Tom instructed. "Until I return."

Dolohov, Nott, Mulciber and Rosier, the four followers Tom had chosen to accompany him all nodded at once, bowing lightly.

"Of course, milord," Nott whispered.

Tom turned to me with a very smug expression. He just loved to have them obey. "Do you want to return to Hogwarts once more, love?"

"Nothing more than that."

He smiled and held out his arm to escort me outside. I observed very well that the smile didn't reach his eyes. He seemed anxious – yes, even nervous.

"You know you won't get the job."

"Why, I hope that I get a chance."

"I doubt it."

"Ah, you know me. I always get what I want."

He had a point, I thought as we passed the gates to the Hogwarts grounds. He in fact _always_ got what he wanted.

"It feels incredible to be back... do you feel it?""

"Feel what?"

"The magic surrounding us... it's stunning, really."

I tried to see his face, but the darkness and the snow falling didn't allow it. "No."

"Oh, come on, you gotta feel that-"

"Look," I said instead. "That hut over there – I heard that Hagrid guy lives there now."

"Who?"

"Hagrid – the boy you... never mind."

We kept silent until we reached the castles door. We stepped inside the entrance hall and I looked around. Nothing had changed. I had expected it to be different. That you would remark the change of times. I had expected that it would _feel_ different from what it had felt like. In fact, though, it felt like being back home.

"You don't mind waiting, do you?" Tom said as we climbed up the stairs. "I'm sure it won't take too long..."

"No, of course not...

We reached the headmaster's office and Tom whispered, "Chocolate frog!" causing the gargoyles to move apart. The stopped in the doorway and turned around. "I'll be back soon – don't you go straying..."

"Please. I'm an adult."

He scoffed, but turned without another word and climbed up the stairs and the passage closed behind him.

It did take shorter than I had thought. He was back in no time; the red in his eyes glittering dangerously.

"You didn't get the job."

"No."

"So?"

"I need to... do something – you go up talk to him... persuade him to take me if you can – look, he knows."

"Knows what?"

"Everything! Who travelled with me – how they call me – how..." He shook his head. "I hate the old man."

"I'm sure he knows that, too."

Tom groaned and turned to leave. "Go upstairs! NOW!"

I sighed heavily. Why did he make me do this? Of what use was it? He couldn't think that I was going to convince him while Tom himself had actually failed?

I knocked as I reached the top of the staircase.

"Enter, please."

I opened the door and strolled into the room, trying hard not to let him see that I felt uncomfortable. "Good evening, Sir. I wondered if we could have a talk."

Dumbledore wasn't even mildly surprised at my appearance. It seemed as if he had expected me to come. He gestured to the empty seat in front of him and I sat down. "Well?"

"You denied him the position. I am to ask why."

"He sent you, I suppose?"

"Well, of course he did."

Dumbledore leant forward slightly. "Why did he send you upstairs? Why did he take you with him up to the castle and not one of his Death Eaters? Wouldn't that have been more reasonable?"

I stared at him, unable to comprehend what he had just said. "D-death Eaters?" I choked. "What are you talking about?"

"Ah, you don't know? That's what they call themselves... his followers."

I shook my head. "How do you know?"

"Rumours."

I gulped heavily. "Is that why? Your reason not to give him the post."

"He doesn't want it because he's so eager to be a teacher. There's something different behind it. I don't like the idea that he might influence my students. Besides, he's far too deep into the dark arts to teach their defence."

I managed to smile. "Well, you have to admit that you can't really fight something you don't know."

"But you can't embrace it like he does."

I sighed and nodded. "I told him all the time that you would never accept."

"Yeah? Maybe you can enlighten me over his real goals."

I shook my head. "I can't tell you – seriously, I only know half of what he's planning and that's already frightening me to death... If I knew it all..." I shuddered.

Dumbledore frowned and then he nodded. "You've always been good, Lorraine. You should keep that. Don't go all the way with him."

I smiled again, this time it was real. "But we're long past the point of no return. By now, I have to go all the way. Don't get me wrong. I want to. I have to look out for him, no one else ever does."

* * *

"I have a question for you," I told Tom as we descended the great marble staircase into the entrance hall.

"What would that be?"

"What is a Death Eater?"

He froze in the middle of the staircase and I only realized it when I had already descended a few more steps. I turned around and looked at him expectantly.

"Well?"

"Where did you hear the expression?"

"Rumours."

"Ah," he whispered, his face cold and rid of any emotion. "Greatness inspires envy, envy endangers spite, spite spawns lies. You should now that – you're a journalist."

"Greatness?" I repeated. "It has nothing to do with greatness if people are proud of murder – Death Eater – was that your idea?"

He started moving again and quickly moved to be on the same step as me. "And if it was?" he asked, dangerously calm.

"Then you're even sicker than I thought you were."

His hand moved up; for a second I thought he would hit me, but he didn't. Instead, he shook his head and proceeded down the stairs.

"Come now, we should get back to the others."

"Your Death Eaters?"

"Would you please be quiet."

"You can't expect me to keep quiet on a thing like that! You know how I despise murder-"

"It's not like you could do anything about it."

I froze were I stood, but he didn't care, striding through the entrance hall with large steps. For a moment, I wanted to keep standing, go back upstairs and tell Dumbledore to hide me – never let Tom find me again... but Tom turned, looked at me expectantly and I knew instantly that I couldn't leave him – I had just told Dumbledore, but the truth of it hit me just now. I could never leave him. He needed someone to watch over him. He only had me and I only had him.

* * *

**Take a moment and tell me what you think. I appreciate it.**


	19. The Killing Curse

**Thanks to all those who read, fav'd, alerted and especially to those who reviewed!**

**I don't have anything to say, really, so yeah, here's the chapter:**

* * *

"Walburga, your boys are simply adorable!"

I watched as the three and two year old boys played with a toy broomstick. Both of them seemed quite fond of it, though maybe the younger one of them was a tad more talented.

"Do you think so? They can be very bothersome... Sirius, especially, he can be really obnoxious."

"I can't imagine that!"

She gave a short laugh. "That's what they all say – Bella, too, until she was to watch them for an hour... exhausted after that."

I smiled. "Why, Bellatrix should learn to get along with children. Somewhen she wants to be a good pureblood wife and..."

"Ah, that'll be in a long while – she only just started Hogwarts."

I sighed. "I tell you, it passes faster than you think."

She laughed once more. "Yeah, we'll see – at least, these two are still so young... don't know how my parents were able to send us away... until then, of course, I have to educate them well – wouldn't want them to become anything else but decent purebloods, eh?"

I nodded, numbly, and tried not to think what it would mean to the two boys if they didn't want to be decent purebloods.

* * *

"Tom? Tom? Are you home?"

I heard a distant mumbling but didn't get an answer. I groaned. I had told him a hundred times – search for another place to hold your meetings!

I opened the door to the parlour and indeed found Tom and a fair amount of Death Eaters sitting along our table. It wasn't this, though, that held me in my place. Floating over their heads was a figure that I couldn't quite make out in the shadowy light of the room.

"May I ask what you are doing?"

Tom's head shot up and his eyes, glistening red, met mine. "What does it look like?"

"Looks like you once again haven't listened. I said no meetings in my house."

"Your house?"

"My house. Forgot that it was me who inherited this?"

Tom got up and swept toward me. "Have you forgotten my little lesson on respect already? It's been quite a while, maybe I should-"

"We would have no problem if you would listen – who's that?"

The figure above the table head moaned in pain.

"No one."

"Looks like someone."

"A Muggle."

I stared at him. "What do you plan to-"

"I'll kill him, of course. Just thought we could have a bit of fun-"

"TOM! No meetings in my house, no torture in my house, and most importantly no murder in my house! Get the hell out of here with your Death Eaters and that – that man-"

His eyes narrowed dangerously and he stepped closer. "I think I know what I'll do. Just for you to remember."

I opened my mouth, but he didn't give me the chance to as he whirled around. "You're all dismissed. What? You heard her. Get the hell out of here."

The Death Eaters got up, confused and one after the other left the room, bowing slightly as the passed Tom. The Muggle was left floating over the table.

Tom smiled coldly at me, flicked his wand and the Muggle crashed down on the desk, writhing in pain.

"So," Tom muttered. "No murder in your house you say? No torture – looks like we're gonna have to bend the rules a little."

"No. I told you to get him out of here-"

"Silence. Come here to me."

He had strolled over to the table and glanced down at the Muggle, now lying still. I took a deep breath and went over to join him.

"So... I taught you the Cruciatus Curse, didn't I? Ever used it since?"

"Of course not."

"Shame."

He eyed me thoughtfully. "Do it now."

"No."

"Yes." He seized my wrist and pulled me closer until he could reach into my robes to pull out my wand. "Here," he said, handing it to me. "Do it."

"NO!"

"At once."

I shivered as his eyes bored in to mine. "Come on, what use-"

"Do it, Lorraine." His voice was a calming, almost friendly whisper now. "Do it."

My gaze returned to the Muggle lying on the table. "_Crucio_!"

He screamed, writhed in pain, jerked wildly, really – screamed on top of his lungs.

I turned away, lifting the curse and shook my head. "I don't know why you're making me do this."

"I have many reasons. And we're not finished yet... look, he's still conscious, isn't this just convenient."

"Please," I heard the hoarse whisper of the man. "Please... kill me."

"Ah, what a sound," Tom whispered in my ear. "What about you grant him the favour, love?"

"No," I whispered.

"Why not? He's asked for it... begged for it..."

"No."

"What are you afraid of, Lorraine?"

I turned to look into his eyes. "Afraid to become like you."

He stared for a short moment, obviously stunned with my response. His lips curled into a cruel smirk. "Ah, but I am so very powerful... immortal... invincible. Nothing to be afraid of."

He started to circle me slowly. "You should do it. Now. You have no idea how it'll make you feel – oh, how it makes me feel... it really is intoxicating." He came to a stop right behind me. "Do it, Lorraine. He begged for it – he's suffering. End it!"

I shook my head as his fingertips lightly traced my wand-arm. "I can't."

"Of course you can. A rather simple incantation... only two words, love. You gotta want it..."

"I can't."

"Yes, you can. Do it. Now."

My hand shivered as his fingers closed around my wrist and moved my arm up. "Say it. Go on, Lorraine, end his suffering."

I swallowed hard. "Tom-"

"NOW!"

"_Avada Kedavra_!"

A flash of green light enlightened the room and the writhing Muggle on the desk stopped moving, his eyes wide and his mouth open in his last scream of pain.

"Ah – wonderful. See, I told you that you could- how do you feel?"

I shook my head. There was nothing, just numbness. I saw it right before me but couldn't believe that it had been me... that I had _murdered_.

"Lorraine?"

My eyes met his and instantly filled with tears. I didn't have the words for how I hated him for what he had just done to me...

"Hush, love, oh – you don't have to cry, huh?"

He took a step toward me and pulled me closer. I couldn't help it – I buried my face in his chest, sobbing as he softly stroked my hair.

"Shh – it's all right, everything's all right... hush, love, no need to cry..."

* * *

Time is passing in the most curious speeds. When you're happy or even more so when you've got plenty of work to do, it's rushing away. When you're bored, though, or living through horrible experiences, a second last as long as an hour.

I found that in the next couple of years, time was rushing away most of the time; I mostly didn't have the time to care about Tom's plans at all. Whenever I caught up on pieces of his plans, though, time seemed to come to a sudden halt; catching me in the most horrid episodes of terror, despair and helplessness.

Those episodes were, thank Merlin, rare. As the years passed by, I watched children growing up and adults growing old; once I ran into the Black sisters in Diagon Alley to find they were by now all attending Hogwarts. At another incident, I met Alphard on one of these unnecessary, yet to be attended events and found that he looked – in the lack of a better word – old. As I looked in the mirror, I found that I, too had changed and I wasn't quite sure what to think of that.

Tom changed as well, though he never looked old. His face was nearly unrecognizable to someone who had known him in his youth; it was a pity, I thought, that he let his good looks flow away. Whenever I said so, though, he only snorted at me. Asked me if I found it a good thing to look like a Muggle.

It's the bitter irony of life that one always wants what one can't get – whenever he asked me things like that I would've given anything for him being a Muggle. Just an ordinary guy and not the most powerful evil wizard that ever lived.

* * *

**I'd love to know what you think of it, so please leave a review :)**


	20. The Dark Lord's Most Faithful

**So, guys, here's Chapter 20! **

**Thanks to all those who read, fav'd, alerted and especially to those who reviewed!**

* * *

"A woman? Since when are you having women in your ranks?" I asked Tom as he told me about his plans for the next initiation ceremony.

"I was under the justified impression that you were a woman?"

"Charming, but whatever is concerning me is not the point – I'm not one of your little slaves."

He sighed and shrugged. "I can safely assume that this woman will be a very good servant to me – talented, she is a powerful witch; though still a rough diamond."

"You don't need power," I said matter-of-factly. "Or talent. You need someone devoted. Someone who would die for you."

"Wouldn't it be best if I could get both?"

I laughed. "Who is that charming girl who combines both?"

"Bellatrix Lestrange."

My eyebrows rose almost instantly. "Little Bellatrix Black? A powerful, talented witch? From what I heard, the only thing she's good at is spreading her legs for pureblood gentleman."

His red eyes flashed. "That's not even a little bit true."

"Why defend her? What's she to you? Or did she prove to you that she's good at it so you want to keep her close?"

"Lord Voldemort doesn't make decisions on such profane things-"

I laughed once more, this time it was bitter. "You're profane enough to murder, though..."

"There was nothing of the sort, Lorraine, I'm telling the truth."

"Truth is the one thing that never comes out of your mouth."

He got up and started pacing up and down the room. "There is nothing like that – her husband asked me to hear her and she begged me on her knees to let her join-"

"And that convinced you?"

"I do believe that she'll serve Lord Voldemort well. A very faithful servant-"

"How will her husband like that?"

"Would you please stop it? I'm not sleeping with her!"

"Yeah?" I asked calmly. "How about I ask Rodolphus how he likes that?"

"You're merely jealous!"

"Jealous?" I repeated. "Hardly – I'm delighted. Finally, I have something to hold against you when you get one of your jealousy fits – you get them regular-like... don't look at me like that! I barely have to speak to man to get you all possessive..."

He shook his head incredulously. "I don't know what's got you in such a foul mood-"

"I'm not in a foul mood. Just not in the mood to be told that you're sleeping with that-"

"I'M NOT!"

I raised an eyebrow at him. "No need to get outraged. I told you I'm rather delighted."

He sighed. "This isn't going to change anything about my decision."

"Of course not. It's not like you ever cared about my opinion."

* * *

"Oh, no, no, don't concern yourself – have a seat."

Bella nodded gracefully, an arrogant smile playing around her lips. "Thank you. Rod told me to – excuse me, I mean Rodolphus, my husband – however, he told me to come and introduce me to you. Said it was important to be friendly to the likes of you."

"What an extraordinary clever man, that Rodolphus."

She looked curiously at me. "Actually, I don't know why it matters – you may explain it to me – the Dark Lord accepted me in his ranks, therefore..."

"Ah, but the Dark Lord is well known to be moody. I wouldn't count on his liking for you to last – I don't know why talking to me should help you with that, though, because the Dark Lord usually doesn't listen to me..."

She leant forward, her breast heaving with curiosity. "You are the Dark Lord's mistress, though, am I right?"

"I – is that what people are saying? His mistress?"

Something very strict seemed to appear in her features. "It is an honour to serve the Dark Lord, in any way possible-"

"I don't serve the Dark Lord," I said as calmly as possible. "I'm not a whore."

"It is an honour-"

"Yeah, I believe that you would consider it an honour to share his bed."

"I would!"

"Why, good luck with that."

She opened her mouth slightly, but no words came out. I scanned her sceptically. She was beautiful, there was no point denying it; she had the typical Black features.

"I don't see why I shouldn't achieve my goals."

"By all means, go ahead."

"You wouldn't... wouldn't be... wouldn't it bother you?"

"Ah, that would be a thing between T- the Dark Lord and me, so don't concern yourself. Go ahead. I want to see if it works out for you."

She stared and then finally, she nodded. "Yeah. We'll see."

* * *

"I want you to get rid of her!"

He looked at me with raised eyebrows. "I won't murder my followers-"

"I didn't say murder her! Just... just make her go. She's horrible..."

Tom shook his head. "She's a very faithful servant to Lo-"

"I DON'T CARE! Don't you see? She loves you! No, that's – she adores you, really, worships the very ground you walk on! And I know that you usually like that, but it's really... please. Make her go away."

He raised an eyebrow and walked towards me. "Are you jealous?"

"And if I was?"

"Come now, Lorraine, you know me-"

"Yeah, I know you. There's nothing I think you incapable of doing..."

He looked almost amused. "Sleeping with that woman? Why would I?"

I stared at him. "Well, why wouldn't you? She's... she is... and she would..."

"She would what?"

I shook my head. "You would be jealous as well..."

"I doubt it."

I smirked at him and before I could stop myself I said, "Only two words, darling. Alphard Black."

His face fell and his expression was colder than I had seen it in a long time. "There's a difference, though. You were going to _marry_ him..."

I scoffed. "But you _were_ jealous."

"Yeah," he said. "Yeah, I was. No one touches what's mine."

I looked up at him and rolled my eyes at his sudden display of possessiveness. "Please," I whispered. "Make her go."

* * *

Sure enough, he didn't make her go away. No. After I had talked to him, he kept her even closer to his side.

I watched from the other side of the room as she sat next to him, smiling and watching him with adoration. He was _flirting_. Of course he was. He only did it to anger me and I knew it – but I couldn't help myself. Whenever I saw them together, jealousy ran through my veins.

With a huge effort, I turned my head away from them to look around the room again, scanning quickly who was there. I saw the Malfoys, Abraxas and his son and I shortly thought about joining them when I found someone way better.

"Rodolphus! What a pleasure to see you!"

"Pleasure's all mine, Ma'am."

"Ah, no need for formalities."

He shifted uncomfortably. "The Dark Lord told us to treat you with the utmost respect-"

"I'd feel much more respected if you start calling me Lorraine 'stead off _Ma'am_. Makes me feel old, you see?"

"Of course... Lorraine."

I smiled to him. "Thank you, Rodolphus."

He smiled back at me and I felt that I had already won him over. I followed his gaze and found that he, too, was checking on Tom and Bellatrix. "Aren't you sometimes jealous?"

"She assures me that nothing happened... yet. She hopes it will."

"I understood so much."

His gaze returned to me, he frowned. "Aren't _you_ jealous?"

"Of course I am. I can't even put it in words, when I see those two together... it's not because he likes her, you see, it's because he wants to get back at me. And she... she, of course..."

"She adores him, I know. And I," he hesitated. "It was an arranged marriage."

"Of course," I muttered.

"But I thought... always thought we could make it work. Better. But, you know, she's not the type."

"She's different."

"Special."

"A little strange."

He laughed. "And freaking mad!"

I laughed, too, as he said it. I had talked to him for the sole purpose of catching Tom's attention – he'd see right through me, of course, but I had to do it anyway – but Rodolphus seemed to be a pretty nice guy.

The second his laughter died away, I knew something was wrong. Sure enough, I felt strong hands pulling me backwards, firmly planted on my waist.

"Milord," Rodolphus muttered, bowing lightly.

"Lestrange. Having a good time?"

"I – er –"

"Actually," I said. "We were having a blast. What about you?"

"Pretty good time, let's go. Lestrange."

Rodolphus got it at once, he bowed again, deeper this time, mumbled, "Milord", and made a leave as fast as he could.

"You can let me go, you know," I told Tom. "I'm not gonna make a run for it."

"What exactly," he whispered, "Do you think you're doing?"

"I don't know. What do you think I was doing?"

"Messing with my followers."

"I wouldn't be the only one, would I?"

He spun me around quickly, fury burning in his red eyes. It was the first time since long that I felt truly frightened by him.

"You listen to me, very closely now, it doesn't matter what I do, you are not allowed to-"

"Not allowed to?" I repeated. "Not allowed – I'm an adult, Tom, I can do whatever the hell I want. I. Don't. Belong. To. You."

He somehow moved even closer and I felt that he had pulled out his wand, pressing it now tightly into my chest. "Yeah, Lorraine. You do."

* * *

**So, what do you think? I wasn't completely happy with the chapter but it really was the best version of it... However, please tell me your opinion!**


	21. The Locket

**Okay, so here we go with Chapter 21 - I just realized, there will be only 2 more chapters, plus an epilogue, we're heading towards the end!**

**I want to thank everyone who read, fav'd, alerted - and especially the 9 people who reviewed! You're so amazing.**

* * *

"He's in there... oh, Merlin, you're just in time – I doubt he's gonna do it much longer."

I swallowed hard, but nodded and Walburga opened the door for me. The room was very dark as the curtains were closed and only one candle was lit, making it only possible to see vague shapes.

I carefully moved through the room until I reached the bed and carefully sat down on the edge.

"Al? Can you hear me?"

He groaned lowly and then whispered: "Lorraine?"

"Yeah. Yeah, it's me..."

"I'm still alive." He sounded almost disappointed.

"Well – yes."

"Damn it."

I sighed heavily. "Al..."

"I'm surprised you even came," he said in the hoarse whisper that was his voice.

"You asked for me, of course I came."

"Would you have... if I wasn't dying?"

"What sort of question is that?" I asked and he made a great effort to laugh shortly.

"A stupid one... I'm still asking myself..."

"You're asking yourself what?"

"If I hadn't left you back then – maybe we would have..."

I sighed once again. "Al, you can't change the past."

"Looks as if I can't change the future anymore either."

"Sometimes it's not meant to be."

He groaned once more. "I have to ask you a favour."

"Anything."

"Aren't you very quick with that? I thought you had learnt at least a tiny bit... living with Riddle..."

"He takes what he wants anyway, it doesn't matter if I give my consent."

He didn't answer me, but panted loudly a few times.

"Al," I said, worried, "Al..."

"It's all right... I just... don't have long... anymore."

"What did you want to tell me?"

"I'm leaving... leaving my money... all my money... to Sirius-"

"Sirius?" I whispered. No, he couldn't! His family had disinherited Sirius! He wouldn't really. "No, you can't-"

"What's gonna happen... I'll be dead when they know."

I shook my head in disbelief. "They'll never gonna give the money to him."

"Right... I need you... to make sure... that the Ministry... enforces that they follow... my instructions."

"Al," I whispered. "I can't – just think..."

"Do you think... he's a blood-traitor... do you think... I am?"

I stared at him for a while and then whispered, "There is no such thing as a blood-traitor."

"See... that's why I... ask you... will you... go to the Ministry..."

"Of course. Al, of course I will."

"Good...," he whispered. "Good... so... tired."

Tears filled my eyes as his words died away. "Al..."

His heavy panting got quieter, unsteady... every now and then he would breathe. I got up. I couldn't... couldn't be around – I looked at him and his eyes were closed. He wasn't conscious anymore...

"Walburga!" I called as closed the door behind me.

* * *

"What did you think, huh?" Tom growled at me. "Running to the Ministry?"

"Why, it's right that his will is heard-"

"This is a family matter!"

"Why do you concern yourself with it, then?"

He stared at me. "Of course," he whispered. "I should have known... he asked you to, didn't he?"

"Don't know what you're talking about, Tom."

He grabbed me by the arms and shoved me against the wall. "DON'T LIE!"

"Fine," I growled. "Fine then. He asked me to!"

"You didn't have to comply-"

"He was on his death bed! His last wish! How could I not?"

"Because this nephew of his most likely will join the Order of the Phoenix and now even has the money to support himself!"

I blinked, confused. "Order of what?"

He waved his hand impatiently. "Dumbledore founded it. Tries to fight me with a few stupid and reckless wizards and witches... Order of the Phoenix, that's what they call themselves. Black will surely join."

"Why do I only hear of this now?"

Tom stared at me. "That's not the point right now!"

"What the hell? Dumbledore founded an organization to fight you, all right, and you don't even think about telling me-"

"They're not important, okay, they're just nobodies. No threat to me."

I shook my head slowly. "Dumbledore's leading them, Tom, I never thought you to be reckless-"

"Could you please drop it now? This isn't about the Order, this is about you giving money to that blood-traitor!"

"I can't help it anymore, Tom," I said quietly. "I've done what was right. I have to, occasionally."

"There's no right or wrong, how often do I have to tell you? There's only the will of those with power."

"It'll be a very sad day," I told him. "When I start to believe that."

* * *

"Hello, Walburga. Is Regulus available?"

She stared at me for a long moment, until I sighed and said, "I have an important message for him. From the Dark Lord."

That seemed to reassure her and finally, she stepped aside and called up, "Regulus! A visitor for you."

I took only a few seconds and Regulus came dashing down the stairs. He froze, just like his mother when he saw me, but he regained the ability to speak much faster. "Madam. Such an honour."

"Oh, don't overdo it. The Dark Lord needs a house-elf for... reasons. He thought you might be able to offer something – suitable."

Regulus squared his shoulders. "Indeed – of course – our house-elf – Kreacher, where is he? The Dark Lord is free to have him, of course..."

"Why, excellent."

"What... what does he need a house-elf for?"

I smiled slightly. "I don't think that is important."

"No," Regulus said at once. "No, it's not, naturally."

"Good."

He nodded, very slowly. "When – uh – when is he going to need Kreacher?"

"He'll call for him," I said, already turning away to leave again.

"Madam-"

"What?"

"Tell – tell the Dark Lord, it's my greatest pleasure to serve him, even if it's something as simple as-"

"All right, all right, I think he'll catch your drift."

Once again, he nodded slowly. "Yeah... right... thanks."

* * *

"HE KNEW!"

I whirled around, to see Tom hurrying into the room. "What are you talking about?"

"He – he – urgh – _Impedimenta_!"

I quickly moved out of the way as a vase flew through the air and crashed hard against the next wall. "That was a designer piece," I complained.

"Oh, shut up."

"Okay, okay – what happened?"

"Regulus Black."

I raised my eyebrows. "Well, what about him?"

"He knew!"

"Knew what?"

"About my horcruxes."

I searched for words but there were none. If Black knew... if he knew... what would he do?

"What – and what – what did you do?"

"Killed him, of course."

Tom started pacing up and down the room. "I needed the house-elf to put the locket in a safe place. He must've... got out... told him."

"But he's dead," I asked, hoping to confirm it.

"Yeah, I said that, didn't I?"

"Do you think he told anybody?"

Tom stopped dead in his tracks and stared at me. Finally, he shook his head. "Who would he have told, after all?"

I nodded. "You're right," I whispered. "You're right..."

Tom resumed his pacing and I swallowed hard. "Do you think-"

"WHAT?"

"That he found one?"

"I don't think he would've been able to get the locket. Not alone. The ring is safe as well... I have the cup and the diary here, I have to hide them... the diadem is in Hogwarts, in a place that only I know."

"Good. Good... what are you going to do?"

"I'm finding a new place for the cup and the diary – and I'm gonna make another one."

My eyes widened in horror. "Another one, but-""Can't you count? I only have five! I need the sixth... I should've never waited so long... but I wanted it to be a special murder."

"Please," I whispered. "Please, Tom, you shouldn't-"

"Do you want me to die?" he yelled and I flinched.

"No," I answered. "Of course not."

"Then why don't you just shut up?"

I opened my mouth to retaliate, but then decided to just drop it. "Yeah," I muttered. "Whatever."

* * *

**A guest reviewer named "anna" asked me what Lorraine looked like - did I never write anything about it? I'm not sure right now - it's probably because of my dislike for authors who describe in great detail what their character looks like or what he/she wears, I just can't stand it. I also don't have an actress who'd look like Lorraine, 'cause, you know, that's something I equally can't stand... I'd be quite interested in what you think Lorraine looks like! Tell me in a review - and I'll search for any information in my notes until next week!**


	22. The Prophecy

**Guys, you are so amazing! I got 14 reviews for the last chapter! I'm... overwhelmed! Thank you so much! Also to those who read, fav'd, alerted...**

**Answer to our question of last week (what does she look like?) can be found at the end of this chapter for all those interested.**

**Those who aren't interested: I'll stop rambling now, here's chapter 22:**

* * *

I tossed the Prophet away, repulsed by the news. Three muggles murdered down in Southampton. Another child bitten by a werewolf in Stoke-on-Trent. The giants were out of control. So called 'blood-traitors' and 'mudbloods' were being murdered on a daily basis.

And I knew all too well who was responsible for all of it.

"LORRAINE!"

I jumped up and followed the voice at once as he called for me. "Yeah?"

"Come on in. I want to give something to you."

I frowned. "Like – a present?"

"No."

"Then, what is it?"

He looked up to me and my gaze fell to the small book he held in his hands. It was the diary I had gotten him when we had been in fourth year. It seemed like forever ago.

"I want to give this to you. For safekeeping."

"Haven't you learnt from the last time?"

He seemed a little surprised. "Why, you kept it safe well enough, until I left you. And I'm not going to leave you ever again, so I think it to be quite safe with you."

I swallowed hard and then reached out my hand to take it.

He pulled it back, his eyes boring into mine. "Can I trust you?"

He accentuated each word and I raised an eyebrow at him. "Of course you can."

He nodded slowly and handed me the book. I felt the power pulsing through it and gulped. I had almost forgotten how it felt to hold a horcrux.

"What are you going to do with the others?"

He cocked his head to the side and smiled slightly. "I'm gonna give the cup to the Lestranges. They are to hide it in their Gringotts vault."

I had to swallow down my jealousy again. "Do you tell them? What it is?"

"Don't be ridiculous, of course I won't."

"Well, you told me."

"That's something quite different, don't you think?" He leant forward and quickly kissed me on the lips. "Something quite different."

I smiled brightly at him – there it was, one of these rare moments when he was actually... sweet? – but he was back to normal pretty quickly.

"And once I have made sure they are all safe – I'm going to create the last."

* * *

My eyes widened in horror as I listened to what Snape had overheard.

"...and then, milord, I'm sorry, I was found and kicked out, but..."

"Parents that escaped me three times... who? Bellatrix, who?"

Bella stared at him with wide eyes and after a while whispered, "These Aurors, milord – the Longbottoms? And that James Potter – he's got a wife, doesn't he? What about... Sirius Black?"

"Black's not married," I said silently.

"So? And the others?"

"Both women pregnant."

"So what?" he asked. "Which one?"

Snape shook his head, slowly. "I don't know. There's no more hint..."

Tom groaned and started pacing up and down. "There's gotta be more!"

"No, milord, I swear-"

Tom waved his hand impatiently, causing Snape to fall silent at once.

"Fine, then. I'll just have to pick, have I?"

I took a few steps toward him. "Tom," I whispered. "Please – we should... wait. We can't judge like that, can we? We should wait – see their kids develop – we don't even know if it's gonna be a boy or not..."

"Fine," he said. "We can wait until we know that, at least."

"Tom-"

"I WANT TO HEAR NO MORE!"

I inclined my head lightly. Fine, if he wanted it like that, he could have it.

* * *

"It's the Potters."

"What? Why?"

Tom shrugged. "They're both boys... I guess it's the Potter's boys, though."

"And why?"

"I don't – I just have a feeling, all right?"

"No, not all right. I still think we should wait..."

"I CAN'T AFFORD TO WAIT!"

I stared at him, open-mouthed, but pulled myself together relatively quickly. "Yeah? What's the baby gonna do, Tom?"

"I'm gonna finish this before it becomes a real threat."

I shook my head slightly. "You know, Tom, those prophecies only get fulfilled if you fulfil them-"

"That's nonsense."

"No, it's not. Do you honestly think that every prophecy ever made got fulfilled? Of course not! If you'd just leave him alone-"

"Lorraine," he said in a low whisper. "I won't let someone run around alive who could possibly kill me."

"But you can't be killed, Tom," I said. "You're immortal, aren't you?"

"Well, I'd like to think so."

I looked at him, pleading. "Please, Tom, please – don't. It's just a baby... a baby, Tom, you can't-"

"Have you decided, milord?"

We whirled around to see Severus Snape standing in the doorway.

"Yes," Tom said. "Yes, indeed. I am sure that it is that Potter boy."

"The Potter-"

"So, all I need to do is to find them – and kill them. Kill them all, better to have clean break."

Snape paled instantly, but didn't say anything.

"You don't have to kill them all," I said instead. "You don't – please, Tom, please just don't."

He shook his head with a cold, cruel smile. "It's no use, Lorraine. I shall do as I see fit."

* * *

"Fidelius Charm?"

"Yes, they put the Fidelius Charm on it..."

"WHO?" Tom bellowed. "Who is their Secret-Keeper? WHO?"

"I-I don't know, milord-"

"_CRUCIO_!"

"TOM!"

His red eyes flickered to me. "Piece of advice – shut up!"

"I – I bet it's Potter's best friend, milord. Sirius Black. They're very good friends indeed... and Black himself has gone into hiding..."

I swallowed hard. "Wouldn't that be very obvious? Make it your best friend... that's much too obvious."

Tom's eyes met mine. "Maybe you're right. Who would you have picked?"

"Dumbledore," I said without hesitation. "Sure thing he wouldn't be captured. But I don't know that James Potter, maybe he prefers a friend..."

Tom started pacing up and down once again. "I need to know... need to find out..."

Another Death Eater entered the room, bowing slightly. "Milord – Peter Pettigrew wants a word-"

"I don't have time for him."

"He says it's important. Says it's good news."

Tom groaned. "Fine. Fine then, I need some good news."

Pettigrew was a small, rather round man with a face like a rat. He smiled broadly as he entered and bowed. "Milord – splendid news."

"Spill, Wormtail, I don't have all day."

"Milord, I can tell you where the Potters are."

We all froze and Tom's eyes started glittering. "How?"

"They made me their Secret-Keeper."

I groaned. So, James Potter indeed was an idiot – Peter Pettigrew? Everyone who looked at him could see that he was easily broken.

"Wormtail," Tom whispered. "You are right. This is really splendid news."

* * *

Tom grabbed his heavy, dark cloak from the chair.

"Please," I whispered. "Please be careful-"

"Honestly, Lorraine, what should happen to me? I'm the most powerful wizard that ever lived."

I didn't quite agree with him there – in my opinion that was Dumbledore – but I didn't dare to argue with him on that.

"Please... just – just be careful, I have a bad feeling about this."

"Would you please calm down? Nothing's going to happen to me."

He had pulled on the cloak and reached out for his wand lying on the table.

"I'm all calm. Still-"

"Lorraine! Smile for me – very good. And wish me good luck. Not that I need it."

"You don't have to kill them," I whispered, my last attempt to change his mind. "Just don't kill the parents-"

"They'll fight."

"Just stun them or something-"

"I promised Severus I'd spare the woman. That's what I'm gonna do... I'll offer her to step aside."

"She won't."

"Why? Of course she will!"

I sighed. "You don't understand – if it's for her child-"

"Why would she choose death over live?" He stood in front of me, smirking coldly. "Is it love again?"

"Yes it is love! Of course she would choose to die if she could protect her son with that!"

He huffed and turned away. "I'll see you later tonight – we'll celebrate."

* * *

**Well, we all know they won't, right? I'd be very interested to know what you think will happen to Lorraine after Voldemort's downfall - tell me in a review! **

**As we speak of reviews - I'm - or we are - currently at 94 reviews. I'd like to make that 100 at least! Help me, please! :)**

**Now on to our question from the last week: I actually have never mentioned ANYWHERE what she looks like ;) I received several opinions, though. Some seem to think that she's got brown hair, and I'd go with that. Someone said that she looks like Salma Hayek - so, for me, she doesn't, but if she looks like that for you, that's fine ;) Someone said she'd have black hair and green eyes - a very Slytherin combination ;) She's no Slytherin, though, so... but again, if you imagine her like that, that's absolutely fine with me. Personally, I'll go with the brown hair and brown eyes option. So, anna, I hope that helped you somehow!**


	23. The Ones That We Love

**This is the last "real" chapter, guys. I'll post the epilogue tomorrow. I'll thank you all in greater detail then :) **

**For now, thanks to all those who read, fav'd, alerted and especially to the amazing people who reviewed!**

**The most original answer to our question from last week (What will happen to her?) can be found at the end of this chapter for all those interested. **

**For those who're not: Here's Chapter 23.**

* * *

I screamed. The pain in my arm was just too much – it had started there and

now filled my whole body. I barely felt that my legs gave in and I crashed

to the floor – and then it was gone. Over. There was no pain anymore... only that inexplicable emptiness... my eyes found my arm where the mark should have been – only there was barely any sign of the mark. It looked like a scar more than a mark – whereas it had just shined in bright black, it now was barely visible.

My eyes filled with tears as I realized what the numbness meant.

* * *

No one had bothered to sit down. Lucius Malfoy and Igor Karkaroff stood in the middle of the room screaming at each other. I watched them for a little while and then said, not even bothering to raise my voice: "Silence."

Everybody looked at me, eyes fixed on what was closest to an authority, their Lord's mistress. Only Lucius and Igor didn't hear me, they still screamed and I forgot my calmness. "I said SILENCE!"

They jumped and turned to face me.

"Idiots. Your fighting doesn't help anybody." I took a deep breath and whispered: "We have suffered a great loss."

"Is he gone for good?" Yaxley asked, his voice barely a whisper.

I stared at him. Of course he was not gone for good. But if he ever returned, he would surely kill me if I told anybody about his horcruxes. "What do you think, huh? The Dark Lord, killed by a baby?"

Lucius sighed. "So what do we do?"

"Try not to get yourselves into Azkaban; it was foolish enough of the Lestranges to do so."

"They are convinced he's coming back to free them..."

I shrugged. That surely wasn't his top-priority. My eyes travelled throughout the room and I found the only sitting person. Severus Snape, staring at the wall with a blank expression, he didn't seem to hear anything. And then suddenly, a tear escaped his dark eyes.

"Severus," I whispered.

He suddenly regained conscience; he looked at me and blurred: "She's dead!"

The other Death Eaters stared at him.

I met his gaze and said: "You are all dismissed. We shall not meet again."

Severus didn't move while all the others exited the room and I sat down next to him.

"I am sorry."

"He promised to save her."

"Oh, I beg you. He promises a lot of things."

Severus looked at me tears in his eyes. "How can you be so calm?"

How could I be so calm? I couldn't know if it had worked, didn't know where he was, _what_ he was. It was official now; I would never get back the Tom that I had always loved. Maybe I wouldn't even get Lord Voldemort back.

"I don't know. I just try to... Severus, we both suffered..." I swallowed. "If I were you. I would do anything to keep the boy safe. You see, she lives on in him."

"She's gone."

"Do you really believe the one's that we love ever leave us for good? They don't, they stay, they..."

"She didn't love me, she never did."

"That doesn't make it any easier, Severus." I tried a sympathetic smile.

* * *

I had pulled my cloak deep in my face as I moved through the thick rain. I reached the gate in front of the Manor and had to stop.

"What is it that you desire?"

"I am Lorraine Riley. I want a word."

The gate swung open and I started walking once more, hurrying up to the house. As I reached the entrance hall, Narcissa Malfoy came hurrying toward me, carrying her little son.

"Lucius is up in the library – you should be dry before though-"

I quickly muttered a spell and felt warmer at once.

"You know the way, don't you? Shall I accompany you?"

"That won't be necessary. Thank you, Narcissa."

I climbed up the great staircase and passed a few doors before I reached the door to the library. I didn't bother to knock.

Lucius obviously waited for me already. He sat in a chair, his book lying open next to him on a table, and he was staring at the door. He got up as I entered.

"Lorraine. What can I do for you?"

I pulled off my cloak and sighed. "I heard you were cleared off all charges."

"Indeed. A little money always helps-"

"Don't smile! I know that you said to have been forced – I know that the word Imperius Curse fell from your lips as well as regret. You've betrayed the Dark Lord."

Lucius went paler than he usually was. "I – I never – you told us to keep out of Azkaban."

"Ah, Lucius, but at what cost?"

He opened his mouth to speak, but no words were coming out.

"However, I am glad that you're free in a way, Lucius – I have something important to give you."

I reached into my bag and pulled the diary out.

"This is a device that could open the Chamber of Secrets... the Dark Lord planned on bringing it back to Hogwarts somewhen – as it stands, though, I need a reliable place... a place where it is safe."

"Why – why don't you keep it?"

"They're after me, I am afraid... they're just waiting for the right moment to capture me. I need it safe. Will you keep it safe, Lucius? For the Dark Lord."

"The Dark Lord is dead."

"Do you want to rely on that? I want you to hide it away! Keep it safe! And never give it away."

Lucius' eyes were fixed on me as he reached out and took the diary from me. "You have my word."

* * *

The bell rang throughout my flat and I got up from where I had hidden myself with my tears and strode through the rooms to open up the door.

I froze as I saw two Aurors with their wands raised. "Good evening," I whispered carefully.

"Miss Riley?"

"Yes."

"We have to ask you to accompany us."

"Sorry, what?"

"We ask you to accompany us. You are hereby arrested."

I took a step backwards. "What for?"

"For being a Death Eater."

I laughed and even to me it sounded hysterically. "I never was a Death Eater!"

"That is not our ability to decide."

"I'm not going to Azkaban."

"Please, be reasonable. If you don't accompany us voluntarily, we'll have to..."

I took another step back into my flat. "No. No, I won't..."

"Miss Riley..."

But I had my wand in my hand and pointed at them. "Don't you dare come any closer-"

"I beg you-"

"_Petrifi-_"

"_STUPEFY!_" one of the two yelled and I fell backwards into nothingness.

* * *

I tried to sit straight in my chair, even though the chains were holding me and I wanted nothing more than to give in and slump into the chair. But I couldn't. The wizards and witches of the Wizengamot were watching me and I wouldn't give in.

"So, do you deny that you have a Dark Mark?"

"No, but-"

"And do you deny that you have been very well acquainted with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named?"

"No, but-"

"So, how can you claim not to be a Death Eater, then?"

"If you would just listen – the Dark Lord and I-"

"Aha! The Dark Lord! Only his followers will call him that."

I tried to take a deep breath. I wasn't a Death Eater! I wasn't Tom's follower! I shouldn't go to Azkaban for crimes I had never committed!

"Mr Crouch, please – I am not a follower of You-Know-Who! He and I were friends since we were in school and we were..."

"So, you've always served him? Been one of the first to receive the Mark?"

"That, yes, but-"

"I think I have heard enough."

I shook my head. "Mr Crouch, please let me explain-"

"SILENCE! Enough, I said. Now, let's vote. Any in favour of punishment in form of an imprisonment in Azkaban?"

I saw hands rise and couldn't manage to find one that didn't vote for that.

"Very well. It is decided. You are to be arrested in Azkaban."

I felt the by now familiar coldness of the dementors creeping towards me, but I decided to fight one final time.

"Have it your way, Crouch, but I warn you! There will be a time when you regret turning the innocent against you! The Dark Lord will return and then you'll see - you will see!"

* * *

**I know a lot of you didn't want her to end up in Azkaban. But seriously, guys, what do you expect? I'm not saying she deserved it, but people have gone to Azkaban while being even more innocent (see Sirius) and we all know wizards don't have the best legal system, right? ;)**

**Now, the most original answer came from "Ryah Ignis" who suggested Lorraine should change her name to Charity Burbage and teach Muggle Studies. You had me laughing so hard... **

**So... in lack of question who'd be relevant to anything on this story, I'm simply going to ask you: How are you doing?**


	24. Epilogue - Red Eyes

**This is it. The Epilogue. Faded Sunset and maruaderlove, I'm glad you're doing good :) Everything else that there is to say at the end of this very short chapter.**

* * *

The mark had burnt as painful as it never had in the last – how many? – years. I wasn't keeping track. I didn't know how much time had passed since it had burnt like that. It was constantly burning slightly by now.

But today, whatever day it was, it was different. I could feel it.

I could feel _him_.

It wasn't exactly a happy thought.  
I couldn't remember anything happy anymore. I couldn't remember anything happy, anything good about Tom anymore. I fairly remembered that sometime, there had been something like that.

Nowadays, I only remembered the bad parts. The torture. The killing. Red eyes glowing in the dark.

And I was innocent. I had never been a Death Eater! Even that wasn't a happy thought. It was a damn frustrating thought.

I faintly heard a screech, almost triumphing and I wondered what that was. I heard yelling, other screeches, a high voice giggling, laughing maniacally.

And then – suddenly – it was as if the veil was lifted. I felt like I could breathe for the first time since – since so very long. Memories were streaming through my head, memories I had all forgotten about.

"_Is that seat still free?" I smiled and nodded and Tom sat down next to me._

_... Tom's face lightened up and he hugged me. "I missed you!"_

_... __"You already have my heart. You should have a part have my soul, too."_

_... __"Stay," he whispered and I nodded_

_... __He kissed me on the cheek as he passed me_

_..._ _"But they can't tell when to be scared and when not. They don't know me well enough... that's only you."_

My eyes widened as the cell's bars were suddenly busted away. I jumped to my feet, new energy filling every inch of my body.

The dust settled and I could finally see a tall man with a pale, snakelike face standing there and watching me.

His red eyes were glowing in the dark.

* * *

**I want to thank everyone who stayed with this story until the very end.**

**There might be a sequel sometime – but honestly, not in the near future. I haven't decided what I'd want to happen to her and I won't start writing until I have a decent end for her, you know? So right now, there isn't a single word written, there isn't even an idea.**

**There is totally different story coming up, though. And a one-shot or two. XxBookXxWormXx once suggested that I write a story about Alphard and Lorraine, 'cause they're just a lovely couple, and I want to do a one-shot. Right now, the words aren't flowing, though. But it'll probably come.**

**So, keep track, I won't leave you hanging too long, promised! My new story is currently being read by my beta, (thanks, right now, Rapha, for beta-ing all this, it means so much to me!) and it could take a while. She's an Au-Pair, you see, so she doesn't have a lot of time.**

**Anyways. I want to especially thank everyone who reviewed. And especiallyespecially [;)] those who reviewed a lot of chapters. It was nice to be able to rely on that.**

**So, special thanks to:**

**anna**

**Azura Soul Reaver **

**DamonSalvatorelover **

**DeFaBiGoRiTy**

**Faded Sunset**

**Gemelina23**

**Isabella95**

**Namine1993**

**Ryah Ignis**

**Smilinsteph**

**XxBookXxWormXx**

**You guys rock!**

* * *

**P.S. Guest - you mean like, a Voldemort's daughter story or something? 'Cause I had ideas, but honestly, that's all so cliché... Maybe sometime... but definitely isn't one of my next projects ;) **


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